[Enter SIR WILLIAM FONDLOVE.]
Sir Wil. Dear Widow Green!
W. Green. Sir William Fondlove!
Wal. Thank My lucky stars! [Aside.]
W. Green. I would he had the gout, And kept his room! [Aside.]--You're welcome, dear Sir William!
'Tis very, very kind of you to call.
Sir William Fondlove--Master Waller. Pray Be seated, gentlemen.--He shall requite me For his untimely visit. Though the nail Be driven home, it may want clinching yet To make the hold complete! For that, I'll use him.--[Aside.]
You're looking monstrous well, Sir William! and No wonder. You're a mine of happy spirits!
Some women talk of such and such a style Of features in a man. Give me good humour;That lights the homeliest visage up with beauty, And makes the face, where beauty is already, Quite irresistible!
Sir Wil. That's hitting hard. [Aside.]
Dear Widow Green, don't say so! On my life You flatter me. You almost make me blush.
W. Green. I durst not turn to Master Waller now, Nor need I. I can fancy how he looks!
I warrant me he scowls on poor Sir William, As he could eat him up. I must improve His discontent, and so make sure of him.--[Aside.]
I flatter you, Sir William! O, you men!
You men, that talk so meek, and all the while Do know so well your power! Who would think You had a marriageable daughter! You Did marry very young.
Sir Wil. A boy!--a boy!
Who knew not his own mind.
W. Green. Your daughter's twenty.
Come, you at least were twenty when you married;That makes you forty.
Sir Wil. O dear! Widow Green.
W. Green. Not forty?
Sir Wil. You do quite embarrass me!
I own I have the feelings of a boy, The freshness and the glow of spring-time, yet, -The relish yet for my young schooldays' sports;Could whip a top--could shoot at taw--could play At prison-bars and leapfrog--so I might -Not with a limb, perhaps, as supple, but With quite as supple will. Yet I confess To more than forty!
W. Green. Do you say so? Well, I'll never guess a man's age by his looks Again.--Poor Master Waller! He must writhe To hear I think Sir William is so young.
I'll turn his visit yet to more account.--[Aside.]
A handsome ring, Sir William, that you wear!
Sir Wil. Pray look at it.
W. Green. The mention of a ring Will take away his breath.
Wal. She must be mine Whate'er her terms! [Aside.]
W. Green. I'll steal a look at him!
Wal. What! though it be the ring?--the marriage ring?
If that she sticks at, she deserves to wear it Oh, the debate which love and prudence hold! [Aside.]
W. Green. How highly he is wrought upon! His hands Are clenched!--I warrant me his frame doth shake!
Poor Master Waller! I have filled his heart Brimful with passion for me. The delight Of proving thus my power!
Sir Wil. Dear Widow Green! - She hears not! How the ring hath set her thinking!
I'll try and make her jealous. [Aside.]--Widow Green!
W. Green. Sir William Fondlove!
Sir Wil. Would you think that ring Could tell a story?
W. Green. Could it? Ah, Sir William, I fear you are a rogue.
Sir Wil. O no!
W. Green. You are!
Sir Wil. No, on my honour! Would you like to hear The story of the ring?
W. Green. Much--very much.
Sir Wil. Think'st we may venture draw our chairs apart A little more from Master Waller?
W. Green. Yes.
He'll bring it to a scene! Dear--dear Sir William, How much I am obliged to him! A scene!
Gods, we shall have a scene!--Good Master Waller, Your leave I pray you for a minute, while Sir William says a word or two to me. -He durst not trust his tongue for jealousy!--[Aside.]
Now, dear Sir William!
Sir Wil. You must promise me You will not think me vain.
W. Green. No fear of that.
Sir Wil. Nor given to boast.
W. Green. O! dear Sir William!
Sir Wil. Nor A flirt!
W. Green. O! who would take you for a flirt?
Sir Wil. How very kind you are!
W. Green. Go on, Sir William.
Sir Wil. Upon my life, I fear you'll think me vain!
I'm covered with confusion at the thought Of what I've done. 'Twas very, very wrong To promise you the story of the ring;Men should not talk of such things.
W. Green. Such as what?
As ladies' favours?
Sir Wil. 'Pon my life, I feel As I were like to sink into the earth.
W. Green. A lady then it was gave you the ring?
Sir Wil. Don't ask me to say yes, but only scan The inside of the ring.--How much she's moved. [Aside.]
Wal. They to each other company enough!
I, company for no one but myself.
I'll take my leave, nor trouble them to pay The compliments of parting. Lydia! Lydia!
[Goes out.]
W. Green. What's here? "Eliza!" So it was a lady! -How wondrously does Master Waller bear it!
