登陆注册
12107900000087

第87章 PART ONE(86)

Assuredly,if any one had said to him at such moments that the hour would come when that name would ring in his ears,when the hideous words,Jean Valjean,would suddenly emerge from the darkness and rise in front of him,when that formidable light,capable of dissipating the mystery in which he had enveloped himself,would suddenly blaze forth above his head,and that that name would not menace him,that that light would but produce an obscurity more dense,that this rent veil would but increase the mystery,that this earthquake would solidify his edifice,that this prodigious incident would have no other result,so far as he was concerned,if so it seemed good to him,than that of rendering his existence at once clearer and more impenetrable,and that,out of his confrontation with the phantom of Jean Valjean,the good and worthy citizen Monsieur Madeleine would emerge more honored,more peaceful,and more respected than ever——if any one had told him that,he would have tossed his head and regarded the words as those of a madman.

Well,all this was precisely what had just come to pass;all that accumulation of impossibilities was a fact,and God had permitted these wild fancies to become real things!

His revery continued to grow clearer.

He came more and more to an understanding of his position.

It seemed to him that he had but just waked up from some inexplicable dream,and that he found himself slipping down a declivity in the middle of the night,erect,shivering,holding back all in vain,on the very brink of the abyss.

He distinctly perceived in the darkness a stranger,a man unknown to him,whom destiny had mistaken for him,and whom she was thrusting into the gulf in his stead;in order that the gulf might close once more,it was necessary that some one,himself or that other man,should fall into it:he had only let things take their course.

The light became complete,and he acknowledged this to himself:That his place was empty in the galleys;that do what he would,it was still awaiting him;that the theft from little Gervais had led him back to it;that this vacant place would await him,and draw him on until he filled it;that this was inevitable and fatal;and then he said to himself,'that,at this moment,be had a substitute;that it appeared that a certain Champmathieu had that ill luck,and that,as regards himself,being present in the galleys in the person of that Champmathieu,present in society under the name of M.Madeleine,he had nothing more to fear,provided that he did not prevent men from sealing over the head of that Champmathieu this stone of infamy which,like the stone of the sepulchre,falls once,never to rise again.'

All this was so strange and so violent,that there suddenly took place in him that indescribable movement,which no man feels more than two or three times in the course of his life,a sort of convulsion of the conscience which stirs up all that there is doubtful in the heart,which is composed of irony,of joy,and of despair,and which may be called an outburst of inward laughter.

He hastily relighted his candle.

'Well,what then?'he said to himself;'what am I afraid of?What is there in all that for me to think about?

I am safe;all is over.

I had but one partly open door through which my past might invade my life,and behold that door is walled up forever!That Javert,who has been annoying me so long;that terrible instinct which seemed to have divined me,which had divined me——good God!and which followed me everywhere;that frightful hunting-dog,always making a point at me,is thrown off the scent,engaged elsewhere,absolutely turned from the trail:

henceforth he is satisfied;he will leave me in peace;he has his Jean Valjean.Who knows?it is even probable that he will wish to leave town!And all this has been brought about without any aid from me,and I count for nothing in it!

Ah!but where is the misfortune in this?Upon my honor,people would think,to see me,that some catastrophe had happened to me!

After all,if it does bring harm to some one,that is not my fault in the least:

it is Providence which has done it all;it is because it wishes it so to be,evidently.

Have I the right to disarrange what it has arranged?

What do I ask now?Why should I meddle?

It does not concern me;what!

I am not satisfied:but what more do I want?

The goal to which I have aspired for so many years,the dream of my nights,the object of my prayers to Heaven,——security,——I have now attained;it is God who wills it;I can do nothing against the will of God,and why does God will it?In order that I may continue what I have begun,that I may do good,that I may one day be a grand and encouraging example,that it may be said at last,that a little happiness has been attached to the penance which I have undergone,and to that virtue to which I have returned.

Really,I do not understand why I was afraid,a little while ago,to enter the house of that good cure,and to ask his advice;this is evidently what he would have said to me:It is settled;let things take their course;let the good God do as he likes!'

Thus did he address himself in the depths of his own conscience,bending over what may be called his own abyss;he rose from his chair,and began to pace the room:

'Come,'said he,'let us think no more about it;my resolve is taken!'but he felt no joy.

Quite the reverse.

One can no more prevent thought from recurring to an idea than one can the sea from returning to the shore:

the sailor calls it the tide;the guilty man calls it remorse;God upheaves the soul as he does the ocean.

After the expiration of a few moments,do what he would,he resumed the gloomy dialogue in which it was he who spoke and he who listened,saying that which he would have preferred to ignore,and listened to that which he would have preferred not to hear,yielding to that mysterious power which said to him:

'Think!'as it said to another condemned man,two thousand years ago,'March on!'

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 凌倾风华:废柴逆命公主

    凌倾风华:废柴逆命公主

    本是国际知名集团总裁,一朝穿越,成为南阳国废柴公主,受尽耻辱,而她早已不是原来的她,超强的天赋,倾城的容貌,看昔日落魄公主,如何成功逆袭,登上皇位,成为九五之尊,傲视天下的女皇!!而身为九五之尊的她,身上却隐藏着惊天的大秘密!从巅峰到落魄,从卑微到至尊,命运的齿轮悄无声息的转动。。。。。他,身为人们口中的传奇人物,腹黑强大,俊美无双,轮回十世,却终究躲不过命中的劫,当梦中的身影现世,当真相一层一层的揭开,当昔日的恋人反目成仇......原来,逆天之人终究躲不过命运的摆弄,原来不是所用恋人都有完美的结局,原来你与我最好的结局竟是永生不见!
  • 末世:灭绝

    末世:灭绝

    丧尸肆虐,人性最丑恶的一面展露。作者的第一部小说
  • 抢仙:总裁的VIP情人

    抢仙:总裁的VIP情人

    这家伙从头到尾就是在扮猪吃老虎,分明就是欺负她好几千年没来过人间,初到凡尘,把她骗上床,然后吃干抹净!好啊!神仙也敢耍?你小子是活得不耐烦了!要知道,神仙可是会仙法的!可是怎么回事?她怎么飞不动?她的仙法呢?糟了!最重要的仙法没了,她不得被他吃得死死的?!以后骨头还有得剩吗?
  • 愿十月待你静好如初

    愿十月待你静好如初

    落茗茶,云名中学的一名高二的学生,她的成绩不好,总是和那些不三不四的人混在一起,赌博,抽烟,打架,什么都干,父母拿她没有办法,直到十月初,她遇见了一个人,那个人从此就改变了他的一生。他总是一袭白衫,偏偏就是这样的他才让落茗茶动心。他是学霸,他和落茗茶恰恰相反,他喜欢学习,偶尔也和朋友们出去浪一下。他们做了同桌,整整一个高二,落茗茶就改变了许多。第二年的十月,他离开了,一声不吭。落茗茶看着那一片大海:愿十月待你静好如初!
  • 影视冒险记

    影视冒险记

    “张真人,在下会《九阳神功》可帮张无忌驱逐体内寒毒。”“埃里克,变种人并不是人类唯一进化,古武才是人类真正的进化。”“威震天、擎天柱,地球是人类的家园,不是你们的战场!”
  • 花都奇缘之杀手保镖

    花都奇缘之杀手保镖

    他是一个杀手也是一个医生,却因奇怪的任务,纵身花都,与各色美女相遇相逢;是机缘巧合还是命中注定。奇怪的任务背后又隐藏着一个怎样的使命,无形之中的牵引,天命之人的汇聚,又会带来怎样的精彩故事。敬请期待花都奇缘之杀手保镖
  • 神之默示录

    神之默示录

    没有一个人是出生就是王者,我可以忍辱负重,我会静静地蛰伏。待到时机,一鸣惊人。北天极的圣书碎片,被封印在这片大陆。接受使命的召唤,我将站在山巅。俯视苍茫的大地,一把弓,一把刀,便是我的伙伴。天下之大又何妨?天下都只会是我的舞台,我就是王者!
  • 遇见宁致远

    遇见宁致远

    “欣妍,你知道吗?我从第一眼见到你就已经认定了你是我这辈子要娶的女人,那天晚上见到你,听你给我讲你受的委屈,看见你默默的流眼泪,看见你难受,我心如刀绞,我知道那个男人伤害了你伤害了你的感情,但是欣妍从今以后我再也不会让你再受一丁点委屈,就让我来保护你、呵护你、照顾你一辈子吧?好吗?”就在这一刻,仿佛时间静止了,看着眼前的这一景象欣妍没有松开宁致远的手,因为她发现她有点不排斥他了,仿佛这个男人有一双温暖的肩膀等着她去依靠,他手心的温度似乎已经融化了面前这个女人被伤过的心,她忽然有种冲动想去抱住他,可是……
  • 冰山总裁变妻奴:赖上萌妻

    冰山总裁变妻奴:赖上萌妻

    和自己交往了五年的准老公,半个月后将要和他结婚,这一天,她特意从澳大利亚飞了回来。手里拿着一个盒子,那将是给他未婚夫的礼物,她一下了飞机就赶到他硕大的别墅,脑海里不禁回想起,他说的话。“等以后,我们结婚了,就住进来好不好?”女人莞尔一笑,“好。”那时的他,并不富裕,想要买起那么一栋房子,何年何月才能住进去?于是,他为了她,奋斗努力了四年,终于,他们成了这个房子的主人。他们一直都没有住进去,都想等到新婚夜,入洞房。现在,男人付得起这一栋房子,手里当然不会缺钱。男人在一个公司的顶层上班,月收入十万至一百万,这天,他要去澳大利亚出差,出差只是借口,他是想和自己的情人约会。没想到.........
  • 奔跑吧食尸鬼

    奔跑吧食尸鬼

    在人类生活的城市之中,有某种东西正在悄悄的窥视着…它们潜伏在人群中,狩猎着人类,这个吞食着死尸的怪人,人们称其为食尸鬼……正读初中二年级的萧云,偶然得知了自己是食尸鬼的身份,并意外得到了来自“地狱”的力量……寄生在身体里的食尸虫;力量强大的邪恶敌人邪灵;一条胳膊的怪人老医师…萧云将怎样面对?越过重重难关?…在青年与怪人相遇之时,充满波折的命运的齿轮开始转动了!本小说在起点均有发布,作品名《逗B食尸鬼》