ROME (OCTOBER)
M.CICERO desires his warmest regards to P.Lentulus,imperator.
Your letter was very gratifying to me,from which I gathered that you fully appreciated my devotion to you:for why use the word kindness,when even the word "devotion"itself,with all its solemn and holy associations,seems too weak to express my obligations to you?As for your saying that my services to you are gratefully accepted,it is you who in your overflowing affection make things,which cannot be omitted without criminal negligence,appear deserving of even gratitude.However,my feelings towards you would have been much more fully known and conspicuous,if,during all this time that we have been separated,we had been together,and together at Rome.For precisely in what you declare your intention of doing--what no one is more capable of doing,and what I confidently look forward to from you--that is to say,in speaking in the senate,and in every department of public life and political activity,we should together have been in a very strong position (what my feelings and position are in regard to politics I will explain shortly,and will answer the questions you ask),and at any rate I should have found in you a supporter,at once most warmly attached and endowed with supreme wisdom,while in me you would have found an adviser,perhaps not the most unskilful in the world,and at least both faithful and devoted to your interests.
However,for your own sake,of course,I rejoice,as I am bound to do,that you have been greeted with the title of imperator,and are holding your province and victorious army after a successful campaign.But certainly,if you had been here,you would have enjoyed to a fuller extent and more directly the benefit of the services 1which I am bound to render you.Moreover,in taking vengeance on those whom you know in some cases to be your enemies,because you championed the cause of my recall,in others to be jealous of the splendid position and renown which that measure brought you,I should have done you yeoman's service as your associate.However,that perpetual enemy of his own friends,who,in spite of having been honoured with the highest compliments on your part,has selected you of all people for the object of his impotent and enfeebled violence,has saved me the trouble by punishing himself.For he has made attempts,the disclosure of which has left him without a shred,not only of political position,but every of freedom of action.And though Ishould have preferred that you should have gained your experience in my case alone,rather than in your own also,yet in the midst of my regret I am glad that you have learnt what the fidelity of mankind is worth,at no great cost to yourself,which I learnt at the price of excessive pain.And I think that I have now an opportunity presented me,while answering the questions you have addressed to me,of also explaining my entire position and view.You say in your letter that you have been informed that I have become reconciled to Cmesar and Appius,and you add that you have no fault to find with that.But you express a wish to know what induced me to defend and compliment Vatinius.In order to make my explanation plainer I must go a little farther back in the statement of my policy and its grounds.
Well,Lentulus!At first--after the success of your efforts for my recall--I looked upon myself as having been restored not alone to my friends,but to the Republic also;and seeing that I owed you an affection almost surpassing belief,and every kind of service,however great and rare,that could be bestowed on your person,Ithought that to the Republic,which had much assisted you in restoring me,I at least was bound to entertain the feeling which Ihad in old times shewed merely from the duty incumbent on all citizens alike,and not as an obligation incurred by some special kindness to myself.That these were my sentiments I declared to the senate when you were consul,and you had yourself a full view of them in our conversations and discussions.Yet from the very first my feelings were hurt by many circumstances,when,on your mooting the question of the full restoration of my position,Idetected the covert hatred of some and the equivocal attachment of others.For you received no support from either in regard to my vexatious to me:but much more so was the fact that they used,before my very eyes,so to embrace,fondle,make much of,and kiss my enemy mine do I say?rather the enemy of the laws,of the law courts,of peace,of his country,of all loyal men !that they did not indeed rouse my bile,for I have utterly lost all that,but imagined they did.In these circumstances,having,as far as is possible for human prudeuce,thoroughly examined my whole position,and having balanced the items of the account,I arrived at a final result of all my reflexions,which,as well as I can,I will now briefly put before you.