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第10章 段落写作(The Paragraph)(4)

The report indicates that babies of fathers who smoke are likely to be smaller and weaker than babies of nonsmoking fathers. Of course it is already well known that pregnant women who smoke can damage the health of their babies. My sister smoked twenty cigarettes a day when she was expecting her first child. Another worrying point is that smoking just before the start of the pregnancy can affect the baby later. I heard recently that certain foods harm unborn babies.

2.岔题

The main school building contains most of the classrooms. That was our “second home”, the place where my classmates and I worked, studied, and learned for three years. Beyond that is the science building. That"s where we did all our laboratory work for chemistry and physics. On the right side of science building is a library, where there are a large collection of books and periodicals. We all enjoyed reading, and from this we got a great deal of benefits. Since our teachers were rich in knowledge and taught us very earnestly, we had always done better than students of other schools in joint examinations.

3.重复

Watching TV too much is harmful to your eyes. If you stay in front of TV for too long time your eyes might get hurt. You will be nearsighted. You cannot see clearly when you read. You even cannot see clearly a friend when you meet him in street.

4.片面

Our school is an Army school, so we must obey many rules. Because of this my house is special in some ways. First, our house is very clean, have no pieces of paper on the ground. Everything in my house is neat. Perhaps some other house is dirty, but if my house is dirty we would be punished and forced to clean it.

四、结尾句(Concluding Sentence)

关于写结论句的建议:把握主题句的关键词;总结细节,回答主题句中隐含的问题;用不同的措辞表达同一中心思想。

示范段落:

Our neighborhood has been greatly changed.When I last visited there,about half the homes had been torn down to make way for a superhighway.The remaining buildings were plastered with billboards and surrounded by traffic signs and litter. Now the whole neighborhood has become dirty,noisy and full of cars.

示范段落分析:

主题句:Our neighborhood has been changed.

主题句关键词:changed

主题句隐含的问题: How has the neighborhood changed?

细节:1.a superhighway builtnoisy and full of cars

2.full of billboards, traffic signs and litterdirty

结论句:Now the whole neighborhood has become dirty,noisy and full of cars.

结论句关键词:dirty,noisy and full of cars

结论句总结了细节并回答了主题句提出的问题。

(第三节)段落展开类型

段落的展开方式和篇章极为相似,受英翻汉的影响,有的书叫段落的推展方式。不论哪种说法,实为大同小异。笼统地归类段落展开方式主要有:记叙(narration)、描写(description)、例证(illustration)、比较与对比(comparison and contrast)、分类(division and classification)、因果(cause and effect)、定义(definition)、过程(process) 八大类。其中描写可以细分为:空间(space order)和时间(time order)两种。下面分别举例说明:

一、记叙法 (Development by Narration)

记叙就是把一连串的事件按照时间顺序记录下来。它是最基本但又是最难的一种写作方式。

经常用到的过渡词有:

firstly, secondly, thirdly, etc. / now, before, after(ward), later, until, while, when(ever), then, soon, sometimes, /next, last, finally, /immediately, suddenly, gradually, meanwhile

范文:

I saw a young cyclist, about 20 years old, hold the handle bars tight, and pedal along as quickly as he could. Obviously he wanted to turn left and tried to rush through the green light before it changed to red. He was in such a hurry that he forgot to put his left hand out. And then the driver of the lorry behind him, on seeing that, made a prompt response and slowed down. But a car coming up from behind overtook the lorry and tried to cut in. An accident was inevitable!

本段是一个学生的考试作文,是对一次车祸的客观记述。但是好的记叙文并非都是完全客观的,有的作者也会把人的感情和观点加入进去,这样的文章读起来有的时候会更生动有趣。如下文:

I was lying in my bed thinking how boring this school is and how I can"t wait till I get out of this place when some guys asked me to play soccer with them. So I said “Why not?” and followed them to the field. I didn"t have anything to do anyway. It was a nice summer evening; the sun was getting cool and the grass had been nicely dried. It didn"t take long for us to divide up the team and begin playing. I was playing the centerfield, a very important offense position I was proud of. We must have been playing for about ten minutes when I fell down hurting my right ankle. I had accidentally stepped into a small hole. I felt tremendous pain in my ankle, as if someone was hopping on it as hard as he could with porcupine shoes. Trying to forget the pain, I bit my tongue so hard that I bled. All the guys gathered around to see what was happening. “Hey, Joe, are you all right?” Jim asked.

在写记叙性文章的时候,一定要注意过渡词的使用。

Yesterday at the swimming pool everything seemed to go wrong. Soon after I arrived, I sat on my sunglasses and broke them. Later my bathing suit caught on the rough edge of a chair, tearing a hole in the side of the suit. But my worst moment came when I decided to climb up to the high diving tower to see what the view was like. Once I was up there, I realized that my friends were looking at me because they thought I was going to dive. I decided I was too afraid to dive from that height. So I climbed down the ladder, feeling very embarrassed.

病例分析:

1.缺乏必要的连接词

如下文:

Yesterday I went to the zoo. I entered the zoo in the morning. I found there were many people already there. I bought a ticket and went in. I saw a lot of monkeys playing with each other. One of the monkeys was bathing himself in the sun. I think it is interesting. After this, I went to see a tiger. I took many photos of him. He was so strong and beautiful. I suddenly felt he was so pity. He was in the cage all days. Forest is his home. I feel very sad about that!

2.记叙不清楚

如下文:

Yesterday I met a car accident. It was so frightening! I was walking along the street. I suddenly heard a great sound; I found a car was turning right. Its speed was great; the driver must be a drunkard. It suddenly hit another car. It was damaged greatly. The driver must be dead.

3.目的不明确。如下文:

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