"Guilt is in every line of your face,in your eyes,all over your wretched body.If I'd taken a good look at you any time in all these past years,no doubt I could have seen it just as plain as I can now.No woman or man can do what you've done,and not get a mark set on them for every one to read.""Mercy!"gasped weak little Elvira Carney."Have mercy!""Mercy?"scoffed Mrs.Comstock."Mercy!That's a nice word from you!How much mercy did you have on me?Where's the mercy that sent Comstock to the slime of the bottomless quagmire,and left me to see it,and then struggle on in agony all these years?
How about the mercy of letting me neglect my baby all the days of her life?Mercy!Do you really dare use the word to me?""If you knew what I've suffered!"
"Suffered?"jeered Mrs.Comstock."That's interesting.
And pray,what have you suffered?"
"All the neighbours have suspected and been down on me.I ain't had a friend.I've always felt guilty of his death!I've seen him go down a thousand times,plain as ever you did.Many's the night I've stood on the other bank of that pool and listened to you,and I tried to throw myself in to keep from hearing you,but Ididn't dare.I knew God would send me to burn forever,but I'd better done it;for now,He has set the burning on my body,and every hour it is slowly eating the life out of me.The doctor says it's a cancer----"Mrs.Comstock exhaled a long breath.Her grip on the hoe relaxed and her stature lifted to towering height.
"I didn't know,or care,when I came here,just what Idid,"she said."But my way is beginning to clear.If the guilt of your soul has come to a head,in a cancer on your body,it looks as if the Almighty didn't need any of my help in meting out His punishments.I really couldn't fix up anything to come anywhere near that.If you are going to burn until your life goes out with that sort of fire,you don't owe me anything!""Oh,Katharine Comstock!"groaned Elvira Carney,clinging to the fence for support.
"Looks as if the Bible is right when it says,`The wages of sin is death,'doesn't it?"asked Mrs.Comstock.
"Instead of doing a woman's work in life,you chose the smile of invitation,and the dress of unearned cloth.
Now you tell me you are marked to burn to death with the unquenchable fire.And him!It was shorter with him,but let me tell you he got his share!He left me with an untruth on his lips,for he told me he was going to take his violin to Onabasha for a new key,when he carried it to you.Every vow of love and constancy he ever made me was a lie,after he touched your lips,so when he tried the wrong side of the quagmire,to hide from me the direction in which he was coming,it reached out for him,and it got him.It didn't hurry,either!It sucked him down,slow and deliberate.""Mercy!"groaned Elvira Carney."Mercy!""I don't know the word,"said Mrs.Comstock."You took all that out of me long ago.The past twenty years haven't been of the sort that taught mercy.I've never had any on myself and none on my child.Why in the name of justice,should I have mercy on you,or on him?
You were both older than I,both strong,sane people,you deliberately chose your course when you lured him,and he,when he was unfaithful to me.When a Loose Man and a Light Woman face the end the Almighty ordained for them,why should they shout at me for mercy?What did I have to do with it?"Elvira Carney sobbed in panting gasps.
"You've got tears,have you?"marvelled Mrs.Comstock.
"Mine all dried long ago.I've none left to shed over my wasted life,my disfigured face and hair,my years of struggle with a man's work,my wreck of land among the tilled fields of my neighbours,or the final knowledge that the man I so gladly would have died to save,wasn't worth the sacrifice of a rattlesnake.If anything yet could wring a tear from me,it would be the thought of the awful injustice I always have done my girl.If I'd lay hand on you for anything,it would be for that.""Kill me if you want to,"sobbed Elvira Carney."I know that I deserve it,and I don't care.""You are getting your killing fast enough to suit me,"said Mrs.Comstock."I wouldn't touch you,any more than I would him,if I could.Once is all any man or woman deceives me about the holiest things of life.
I wouldn't touch you any more than I would the black plague.I am going back to my girl."Mrs.Comstock turned and started swiftly through the woods,but she had gone only a few rods when she stopped,and leaning on the hoe,she stood thinking deeply.Then she turned back.Elvira still clung to the fence,sobbing bitterly.
"I don't know,"said Mrs.Comstock,"but I left a wrong impression with you.I don't want you to think that I believe the Almighty set a cancer to burning you as a punishment for your sins.I don't!I think a lot more of the Almighty.With a whole sky-full of worlds on His hands to manage,I'm not believing that He has time to look down on ours,and pick you out of all the millions of us sinners,and set a special kind of torture to eating you.
It wouldn't be a gentlemanly thing to do,and first of all,the Almighty is bound to be a gentleman.I think likely a bruise and bad blood is what caused your trouble.
Anyway,I've got to tell you that the cleanest housekeeper I ever knew,and one of the noblest Christian women,was slowly eaten up by a cancer.She got hers from the careless work of a poor doctor.The Almighty is to forgive sin and heal disease,not to invent and spread it."She had gone only a few steps when she again turned back.
"If you will gather a lot of red clover bloom,make a tea strong as lye of it,and drink quarts,I think likely it will help you,if you are not too far gone.Anyway,it will cool your blood and make the burning easier to bear."Then she swiftly went home.Enter the lonely cabin she could not,neither could she sit outside and think.
She attacked a bed of beets and hoed until the perspiration ran from her face and body,then she began on the potatoes.