登陆注册
15480800000021

第21章 CHAPTER III. MEMORY AND HABIT(5)

Similarly a shameful position, such as that of the prostitute or the chronic criminal, is "relieved" by alcohol and drugs, so that the majority of these types of unfortunates are either drunkards or "dopes." Too often have reformers reversed the relationship, believing that alcohol caused prostitution and crime. Of course that relationship exists, but more often, in my experience, the alcohol is used to keep up the "ego" feeling, without which few can bear life.

Curiously enough, one of the sex perversions, masturbation, has in a few cases a similar genesis. I have known patients who, when under the influence of depression, or humiliated in some way or other, found a compensating pleasure in the act. Here we come to a cardinal truth in the understanding of ourselves and our fellows and one we shall pursue in detail later,--that face to face with mental pain, men seek relief or pleasure or both by alcohol, drugs, sensual pleasures of all kinds, and that the secret explanation of all such habits is that they offer compensation for some pain and are turned to at such times. What one man seeks in work, another man seeks in religion, another finds in self-flagellation, and still others seek in alcohol, morphine, sexual excesses, etc.

With the increasing excitement and tension of our times there is a constant search for relief, and here is the origin of much of the smoking. Most men find in the deliberate puff, in the slow inhalation and in the prolonged exhalation with the formation of the white cloud of smoke, a shifting of consciousness from the major businesses of their mind, from a constant tension to a minor business not requiring concentration and thereby breaking up in a pleasurable, rhythmic fashion the sense of effort. When one is alone the fatigue and even the pain of one's thinking is relieved by shifting the attention to the smoking. Keeping one's attention at a high and constant pitch is apt to produce a restless fatigue and this is often offset to the smoker by his habit. Excessive smoking may cause "nervousness" but as a matter of fact it is more often a means by which the excessively nervous try to relieve themselves. Of course it is not good therapeutics under such conditions, but I believe that in moderation smoking does no harm and is an innocent pleasure.

Some of the pathological motor habits, such as the tics, often have a curious background. The most common tics are snuffing, blinking, shaking of the head, facial contortions of one kind or another. These arise usually under exciting conditions or in the excitable, sometimes in the acutely self-conscious. Frequently they represent a motor outlet for this excitement; they are the motor analogues of crying, shouting, laughing, etc. (Indeed, a common habit is the one so frequently heard,--a little laugh when there is no feeling of merriment and no occasion for it.) Motor activity discharges tension and is pleasurable and these tics furnish a momentary pleasure; they relieve a feeling that some of the victims compare to an itch and the habit thus is based on a seeking of relief, even though that relief is obtained in a way that distresses the more settled purposes of the individual.

In the establishment of good habits, those desirable from the point of view of the important issues of life, training is of course essential. But in the training of children, certain things must be kept in mind: the usefulness, the practical value must be presented to the child's mind in a way he can understand, or else various ways of energizing him to help in the formation of the habit must be used--praise and blame, reward and punishment.

Further, these habits are not to be held holy; cleanliness and method are desirable acquisitions but not so desirable as a feeling of freedom to play and experiment with life and things.

If the child is constantly worried lest he get too dirty, or fears to play in his room because he may disorder it, he is forming the good habits of cleanliness and method but also the worse one of worry.

In the breaking of a bad habit, its root in desire and difficulty must be discovered. Often enough a man does not face the source of his trouble, preferring not to. I am not at all sure that it is best in all cases for a man to know his own weakness; in fact, I feel convinced to the contrary in some cases. But in the majority of difficulties, self-revelation is salutary and makes an intelligent coping with the situation possible. Here is the value of the good friend, the respected pastor, the wise doctor.

The human being will always need a confessor and a confidante, and he who is struggling with a habit is in utmost need of such help.

Shall the struggler with a bad habit break it with its thralldom?

Shall he say to his chains, "From this time, nevermore!" To some men it is given to win the victory this way, to rise to the heights of a stubborn resolution and to be free. But not to many is this possible. To others there is a long history of repeated effort and repeated failures and then--one day there comes a feeling of power, perhaps through a great love, a great cause, a sermon heard, a chance sentence, or a bitter experience, and then, like a religious conversion, the tracks of the old habit are obliterated, never to be used again.

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 我最想要的智慧成功书

    我最想要的智慧成功书

    希拉里是世界上少数极为成功的女人之一。从州长夫人到第一夫人,到国会参议员,到总统候选人,到国务卿,她走过的成功之路给予女人们很多启示。本书从塑造形象、调节心态、经营婚姻、成就事业、重视社交、珍惜亲情等方面,全面传达了希拉里用自身经历告诉我们的智慧成功箴言,告诉女人们如何用希拉里的方式去生活、走向成功。通过阅读此书,你会找到一条成为魅力与智慧并举、勇敢和幸运同兼的成功女性的捷径。
  • 满归安隐

    满归安隐

    这是一个人间、仙界、魔界三足鼎立的世界。这个故事主要讲述两个相爱相恨的姐妹在成为真正的天神这条路上所经历的亲情、爱情、友情,在她们的成长中,感情的变化使她们亦仙亦魔,能否经受住重重磨难和历练······
  • 既见君子

    既见君子

    第二卷简介:叶慕轻佻的挑起萧沉的下巴一字一句的说道:“你好,我叫叶慕。落叶萧萧的叶,爱慕你的慕。”萧沉眼里盛满笑意:“小姐,公共场合请不要动手动脚好么?”……叶慕拿着房产证傲娇的往萧沉面前一扔:“萧老师,你今天不嫁也得嫁!”“叶慕同学,你竟敢抢我的台词!看来老师必须得好好教育教育你。”
  • 宝葫芦—我是女侠

    宝葫芦—我是女侠

    世界有那么多的痛苦与绝望,每每总想一死了之,可是死亡真正降临的那一刻,却发现,世间还有这么多的不舍得。穿越冒险文。坚强乐观的女主会带你们在黑暗的世界里走一遭,带着光明冲破世界。
  • 与鬼同住:倩男幽魂之索吻33次

    与鬼同住:倩男幽魂之索吻33次

    与鬼同住:倩男幽魂之索吻33次这本已经暂停更新了~~~
  • 三生晴

    三生晴

    【已完结】朝鲜王朝的校理通过时光隧道从朝鲜时代穿越到300年后的现代
  • 千丝扣

    千丝扣

    一次饶有兴致的江湖救急,一场随心而动的刻骨爱恋。她与他,是深情相拥,还是伤情而终?
  • 三心混沌曲

    三心混沌曲

    当三界重新连接,有谁能够异界重回...当阴阳交错的时候,光明与黑暗混乱,谁能成就神位...当混沌之曲响起之时,当大灾难降临之日,谁又能摘星握月,创世灭界...光明与黑暗相交,修罗与天使融合,即可创世重生!(新人新书,求关注,求一切可以求的……)
  • 忍耐,等待

    忍耐,等待

    男儿立身天地之间,必经历四季变化,生老病死。必经历人情冷暖,世态炎凉,必经历世事变化,万千莫测,必面对万千天灾人祸,必面对阎罗魔刹,心魔魔障。男儿立身天地之间,面对万千劫难,顶一身正气,走人间,地狱,天堂,走雨雪风刀,人心险恶,走魔障重重,从不放弃!!!
  • 鬼妻之男神秒变男神经

    鬼妻之男神秒变男神经

    一根玉簪的出现,让尘封已久的鬼公主燕利贞得以重见天日,她的到来也让元君乾的生活天翻地覆。由于某些特殊的原因,一人一鬼的命运被连在了一起。但人鬼殊途,为了保住饲主元君乾的小命,也为了找回自己的过去,燕利贞指引着元君乾走上了一条不同寻常的路。无头尸、断魂桥、阴尸蛊……一个个神秘的传说出现在了他们的面前,历史的真相也一点点被揭开。在燕利贞出现之前,元君乾是校园里的白衣男神,一个眼神就能让人春心萌动;但是,在燕利贞出现之后,这个男神的画风变得有些不太正常……*某同学:元同学又在自言自语了,这次还加了动作呢!果然变成神经病了吗?元君乾:……我不是神经病!强迫症患者,听到有人(鬼)说话就忍不住要回答出声,怪我咯?燕利贞:大胆!不怪你怪我吗?*某鬼怪:这小子居然跟她在一起,果然是神经病胆大不怕死啊!元君乾:……我真不是神经病!不跟她在一起我小命才要玩儿完啊!燕利贞:还不赶快过来服侍本公主用膳,想死吗?*燕利贞:大胆刁民,手往哪儿摸呢!你这样的姿色也就只能勉强做本公主的男宠了,神经病!元君乾:……我绝对不是神经病!倒是姑娘你,什么男宠啊,什么刁民啊,你才是神经病吧?燕利贞:来人啊,把这家伙给我拉出去斩了!*某道士:现在施主你明白了吧?元君乾:原来,我真的是个神经病?!燕利贞:我就知道你是一个神经病!