登陆注册
15453200000051

第51章 CHAPTER XI THE SHADOW OF WAR(5)

First that we are all Canadians, first, last and all the time.

Secondly, that we greatly respect and admire our American cousins and we desire only better mutual acquaintance for our mutual good.

Third, that we are loyal to and immensely proud of our Empire, and we mean to stick to it. And fourth, that Germany is a great country and has done great things for the world. As to the historical questions raised, these are not settled by discussion but by reliable historic documents. As to the prophecies made, we can accept or reject them as we choose. Personally I confess that I am unable to get up any real interest in this German war menace.

I believe Germany has more sense, not to say proper Christian feeling, than to plunge herself and the world into war. I move, Mr. Chairman, that we pass to the next order of business.""Hear! Hear!" cried some. "Go on with the programme.""No! No!" said others. "Let's have it out.""Mr. Chairman," said Hec Ross, rising to his feet, "this thing is better than any silly old programme, let's have it out."But the chairman, much against his inclination, for he was a fighter, ruled otherwise. "The differences that separate us from one another here to-night are not differences that can be settled by argument. They are differences that are due partly to our history and partly to the ideals which we cherish. We shall go on with the programme."At first the people were in no mood for mere amusement. They had been made to face for a brief moment the great and stern reality of war. The words and more the manner of Jack Romayne had produced a deep sense in their minds of the danger of a European conflagration, and the ominous words of the young German spoken as from intimate knowledge only served to deepen the impression made by Romayne. But the feeling was transitory, and speedily the possibility of war was dismissed as unthinkable. The bogey of a German war was familiar and therefore losing its power to disturb them. So after two or three musical numbers had been given the audience had settled back into its normal state of mind which accepted peace as the natural and permanent condition for the world.

The entertainment would have come to a perfectly proper and harmonious close had it not been for the unrestrained exuberance of Sam's humorous qualities on the one hand and the complete absence of sense of humour in Ernest Switzer on the other. The final number on the programme, which was to be a series of humorous character sketches, had been left entirely in Sam's hands and consisted of a trilogy representing the characteristics as popularly conceived of the French Canadian habitant, the humorous Irishman and the obese Teuton. Sam's early association with the vaudeville stage had given him a certain facility in the use of stage properties and theatrical paraphernalia generally, and this combined with a decided gift of mimicry enabled him to produce a really humorous if somewhat broadly burlesqued reproduction of these characters. In the presentation of his sketch Sam had reserved to the close his representation of the obese Teuton. The doings of this Teuton, while sending the audience into roars of laughter, had quite a different effect upon Switzer, who after a few moments of wrathful endurance made toward the rear of the audience.

Meantime the obese Teuton has appeared upon the stage in a famished condition demanding vociferously and plaintively from the world at large sausage. But no sausage is available. At this point a stray dog wanders upon the stage. With a cry of delight the famished Teuton seizes the unfortunate cur and joyously announcing that now sausage he will have, forthwith disappears. Immediately from the wings arise agonised canine howlings with which mingles the crashing of machinery. Gradually the howlings die into choking silence while the crash of the machinery proceeds for a few moments longer. Thereupon reappears the Teuton, ecstatic and triumphant, bearing with him a huge sausage, which he proceeds to devour with mingled lamentations over his departed "hund" and raptures over its metamorphosed condition. In the midst of this mingled lamentation and rapture is heard in the distance upon a mouth organ band the sound of the German national air. The Teuton is startled, drops his sausage upon the stage and exclaiming "Der Kronprinz," hastily beats a retreat.

At the mention of this august name Switzer disappears from the rear of the audience and makes his way to the back of the stage. In the meantime, to the accompaniment of organs and drums, appears upon the stage no less a personage than "der Kronprinz," to the reproduction of whose features Sam's peculiar facial appearance admirably lends itself. From this point the action proceeds with increased rapidity. No sooner had "der Kronprinz," who is also in a famished condition, appeared upon the stage than his eyes light upon the sausage. With a cry of delight he seizes it and proceeds ravenously to devour it. But at the first mouthful renewed howlings arise. "Der Kronprinz," in a state of intense excitement, drops his sausage and begins a wild search in the corners of the stage and in the wings for the source of the uproar. The sausage thus abandoned, aided by an invisible cord, wabbles off the stage before the eyes of the wondering and delighted audience. Thereafter "der Kronprinz" reappears with his "hund" under his arm and begins an active and distracted search for his precious sausage.

Disappointed in his search for the sausage and rendered desperate by his famished condition, he seizes the wretched cur and begins gnawing at the tail and retires from the scene, accompanied by the howls of the unhappy canine and the applauding shouts of the audience.

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 地底迷域

    地底迷域

    脉可承混沌之气,化夺天造地之功,各族自成一脉,繁衍千年,数千年后,十六岁的少年竹轩长大,少年空有一身武艺,无奈血脉平庸,受尽欺凌,直至一日,少年遵循着家老的遗嘱,寻到了一处遗址,遗址内,封印着一位少女,从中得到一枚古戒,这枚古戒,改变了少年的世界。世人辱我,负我,欺凌于我,又如何?至此少年坠入混沌,重铸血脉,执掌一域迷城,大手一挥,妖兽大军无人可敌,诛尽一切来犯之人。
  • 盛世之爱妃

    盛世之爱妃

    做个好事竟然穿越成了一个废物,贵为郡主,爹不疼,无娘爱,被皇帝舅舅送去和亲,嫁给恶魔夜王做王妃。听说夜王天生是煞星,凡是身边人都被克死,于是一溜烟逃婚。途中好运不断,救个男人回家,竟然是她要逃婚的未婚夫?老天爷,这是要灭我的节凑吗?(本文纯属虚构,请勿模仿。)
  • 独宠萌宝:男神,泥奏凯!

    独宠萌宝:男神,泥奏凯!

    “有一种默契叫做心照不宣,有一种感觉叫做妙不可言,有一种幸福叫做有你相伴,有一个白痴会把它看完。”夏暖暖最终看到了这封信,眼眶中的泪水夺眶而出,她冲出去紧紧地抱紧他的腰:“对不起……”
  • 寻梦千百度

    寻梦千百度

    这里面有两部小说,第一部是柯南的同人新兰小说,第二部是爱丽丝学园的蜜枣的,欢迎光临!!!--------------------------------------------------------------------有希子说:“新一想向你求婚!”“真的啊!”兰惊讶的说。====================================================================如今的她,不再那么天真,成熟了,懂事了。如今的他,还是一如既往地爱她,但是加深了..............................我是分线................................“妈妈,给我讲讲爸爸你们的故事嘛......"蜜柑:“OK啊......"
  • 我的青春1998

    我的青春1998

    在那个电子与网络刚刚迸发的时代;在那个邻里街坊和睦相处的时代;在那个等待跨越新千年而奋斗的时代。父亲的忠厚,母亲的节俭,姐姐弟弟的打闹,一家人聚在一起的窃窃私语。不分你我生活着的胡同邻居们都还记得,小伙伴们玩耍时露出的那开心笑颜。过去的记忆隐约浮现,整夜辗转反侧,成为今天生活的基础。
  • 遇见遇见遇见

    遇见遇见遇见

    《遇》就是本书的名字,但因为已被占用才会用上面那个蠢名字,阅读的时候请在心里手动更正作品采用多人称叙事,多角度叙述用缓慢悠然的平淡文字描述了普通人的遇见,迷茫在平凡的生活,迷途在一般人的成长,追寻着平淡无奇的追寻,总之都是不值一提的小故事
  • 校园之永恒之恋

    校园之永恒之恋

    萧羽飞握紧了拳头,说道:“这个世界上,一切都不能阻挡我们在一起,如果是天挡地拦,那我便捅破了这天,踏碎了这地。”萧羽飞从小没有父母,在孤儿院长大,用自己的勤奋好学考上了省级的重点初中。然而,却有一个人陪伴他从有意识来现在,她就是萧羽飞的青梅竹马——萧陌离。他们两个几乎是在同一时间出生,同一时间被送到孤儿院,而且父母也是同一时间在相同的地方出了事,那个时候他们才几个月。而且,他们也成为了青梅竹马,天天形影不离,考试的成绩都很相似,而且经常不用想,都能知道对方所想的是什么。不得不说,他们是天造地设的一对。可是,就是这么平静又温馨的生活,被一件突如其来的事情打破了。
  • 那些的青春微凉时光

    那些的青春微凉时光

    记录着,我们写下的时光。那些伤心的快乐的,奋不顾身的,悔不当初的,还有那些我们相互许下的誓言,从此由我记录。qq群:424672725
  • 末世男神快递

    末世男神快递

    穿到这个世界十几年了,现在才发现,这……居然是小说构成的世界,啥?!几本小说?!玛丽苏女:我魅力无边,美男看见我都爱上我了,真是苦恼~穿越励志女:我坚强勇敢不怕苦,白莲花走开,男主是我的!重生复仇女:嗯,她害过我,杀掉!这个人骂过我,也杀掉!本土宅男:末世的美女是我的,都是我的!重生系统男:吻一下有积分很不错,但是为什么是个男的!表面冷清,内心呆萌的女主,带着她的男神女神们在末世拯(chi)救(he)苍(wan)生(le)。注意:1.新手写文文笔不好,雪梨尽量修改。2.女主女扮男装感情戏较少。3.写文配角描述较多。4.本文只是写出来自己看的,以上接受不了的请点叉,不好的地方提出来,请不要乱喷!
  • 迫逆

    迫逆

    一个现代特种兵的灵魂被龙神选中接受了龙神传承,希望能够解救龙神。但是在转生的时候不小心来错了地方。而我们可怜的主人公居然来到只有亡灵的世界里变成了一个亡灵中最最低等级的骷髅,从此他开始了拉帮结派的生活。且看主角怎样在谈笑间,让百万大军灰飞烟灭,怎样在万军之中取上将首级。再看主角怎样在百花丛中谈笑风生,让万千少女为之倾倒。“什么?战神,法神很厉害?”“只不过是一个跳梁小丑而已,老子的一个师长就可以一招解决。”“什么巨龙很强大?”“那只不过是老子坐骑的食物而已。”“什么你说众神的军队我打不过?”“笑话老子只派一个师,就可以轻松拿下。”一只训练有素的军队指哪打哪。