登陆注册
15444500000017

第17章 VII

From the time he had covered himself with the sackcloth and seated himself behind the sledge, Nikita had not stirred. Like all those who live in touch with nature and have known want, he was patient and could wait for hours, even days, without growing restless or irritable. He heard his master call him, but did not answer because he did not want to move or talk.

Though he still felt some warmth from the tea he had drunk and from his energetic struggle when clambering about in the snowdrift, he knew that this warmth would not last long and that he had no strength left to warm himself again by moving about, for he felt as tired as a horse when it stops and refuses to go further in spite of the whip, and its master sees that it must be fed before it can work again. The foot in the boot with a hole in it had already grown numb, and he could no longer feel his big toe. Besides that, his whole body began to feel colder and colder.

The thought that he might, and very probably would, die that night occurred to him, but did not seem particularly unpleasant or dreadful. It did not seem particularly unpleasant, because his whole life had been not a continual holiday, but on the contrary an unceasing round of toil of which he was beginning to feel weary. And it did not seem particularly dreadful, because besides the masters he had served here, like Vasili Andreevich, he always felt himself dependent on the Chief Master, who had sent him into this life, and he knew that when dying he would still be in that Master's power and would not be ill-used by Him. 'It seems a pity to give up what one is used to and accustomed to. But there's nothing to be done, I shall get used to the new things.'

'Sins?' he thought, and remembered his drunkenness, the money that had gone on drink, how he had offended his wife, his cursing, his neglect of church and of the fasts, and all the things the priest blamed him for at confession. 'Of course they are sins. But then, did I take them on of myself? That's evidently how God made me. Well, and the sins? Where am I to escape to?'

So at first he thought of what might happen to him that night, and then did not return to such thoughts but gave himself up to whatever recollections came into his head of themselves. Now he thought of Martha's arrival, of the drunkenness among the workers and his own renunciation of drink, then of their present journey and of Taras's house and the talk about the breaking-up of the family, then of his own lad, and of Mukhorty now sheltered under the drugget, and then of his master who made the sledge creak as he tossed about in it. 'I expect you're sorry yourself that you started out, dear man,' he thought. 'It would seem hard to leave a life such as his!

It's not like the likes of us.'

Then all these recollections began to grow confused and got mixed in his head, and he fell asleep.

But when Vasili Andreevich, getting on the horse, jerked the sledge, against the back of which Nikita was leaning, and it shifted away and hit him in the back with one of its runners, he awoke and had to change his position whether he liked it or not. Straightening his legs with difficulty and shaking the snow off them he got up, and an agonizing cold immediately penetrated his whole body. On making out what was happening he called to Vasili Andreevich to leave him the drugget which the horse no longer needed, so that he might wrap himself in it.

But Vasili Andreevich did not stop, but disappeared amid the powdery snow.

Left alone Nikita considered for a moment what he should do.

He felt that he had not the strength to go off in search of a house. It was no longer possible to sit down in his old place--it was by now all filled with snow. He felt that he could not get warmer in the sledge either, for there was nothing to cover himself with, and his coat and sheepskin no longer warmed him at all. He felt as cold as though he had nothing on but a shirt. He became frightened. 'Lord, heavenly Father!' he muttered, and was comforted by the consciousness that he was not alone but that there was One who heard him and would not abandon him. He gave a deep sigh, and keeping the sackcloth over his head he got inside the sledge and lay down in the place where his master had been.

But he could not get warm in the sledge either. At first he shivered all over, then the shivering ceased and little by little he began to lose consciousness. He did not know whether he was dying or falling asleep, but felt equally prepared for the one as for the other.

同类推荐
  • 寒松操禅师语录

    寒松操禅师语录

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 周易举正

    周易举正

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 满清兴亡史

    满清兴亡史

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 略授三归五八戒并菩萨戒

    略授三归五八戒并菩萨戒

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 献帝春秋

    献帝春秋

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
热门推荐
  • 心罪

    心罪

    我看穿了你们作案的手段,你们以为自己做得天衣无缝,但是死人亦可开口,土壤、光线、气味都会在时间里留下我需要的一切答案,时间是永远不能改变的单向记录。不要忘了,世界有着最简单的逻辑:发生过和未发生终究是不同的。
  • 许你一生泪

    许你一生泪

    妹妹的狠心计算让她魂异大陆,她决定重回凤凰大陆,她努力修炼希望早日报仇,却不想被卷入一场阴谋,费尽心机解决危机,却意外得到一个神秘相公?看她如何周各大陆,快意恩仇!
  • 霏雪录

    霏雪录

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 穿越变成傻公主娃娃

    穿越变成傻公主娃娃

    “快给我穿越变成公主!不然我拆了你的阎王府!”龙南夏对阎王大吼道......
  • 帝冥王印

    帝冥王印

    帝冥国已经近百年未曾出过一个惊世强者了,究竟何为符印之力,少年走上了追求极限力量的巅峰之路。
  • 情不知所起:语薄凉

    情不知所起:语薄凉

    闻人无忧:娃娃,不要皱眉头了,好像小老太婆呀……娃娃,以后无忧陪着你,你在哪儿,我就在哪儿,一辈子……娃娃,对不起,无忧要食言了,无忧不能陪你了……西屠雪衣:语薄凉,你说,你说你爱我,你是爱我的……你从不曾信我,即使如今你也不肯相信我,哪怕一次……封舒玄:我的世界没有黑,没有白,没有光明,没有黑暗,一片浑浊,而你就是我的发光点……打从你救我的那一刻起,我的命就是你的,我信你……曲为心:我以为我负你一生,到头来,只是我以为......语薄凉:我一生机关算尽,却原来还是输了,输得这么惨,这么痛……
  • 尘极
  • 冰山男和乖乖女:九分帅十分拽

    冰山男和乖乖女:九分帅十分拽

    十六岁花季少女姚小布,从她世界里失踪的少年,五年后突然出现。然而,他却装作不认识她,冷漠疏离。少年左戈的到来,给小布平静的生活掀起了波澜,先是受到王子杨耀宾的青睐,再是偶遇奇怪的帅男孩杜德跃,接着又是神秘美少年的热烈追求……这一切似乎都潜藏在一团大谜里。五年前到底发生过什么?
  • 悠悠然的白云

    悠悠然的白云

    好似?深处灵魂压抑的自我释放.文字优美的艺术形式全译..一个?源自于生活中的爱恋..情感的缠绵..对生活的的尽情宣泄.一部凝聚心血.有才能全力以赴的情感和智慧的结晶言情小说.第一部长篇连载小说.简简单单的就是想写一部小说..享受那释放淋漓精致的畅快感...都市言情..《倾城爱恋都市红娘》欢迎各位广大读者的欣赏和点评!感谢各位的支持和喜爱...
  • 古剑奇潭之穿越时空的爱恋

    古剑奇潭之穿越时空的爱恋

    曾经有人告诉过我,对生死之事毫无执念的人,是因为还没有经历过真正绝望的别离。我喜欢的人,就这样离我而去……短暂的一生,许多美好之物都还来不及经历,我想……这世上有没有真正的重生之术。不用以害人为代价,我只希望……他能够重新活过来。。如果有人解开我伏笔会不会朝笑我太过不自量力!明明仅仅是独角戏却还描会出两相依你是我深藏在诗词中的谜底