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第22章 How Lazaro Took up with a Squire(8)

The next morning my master went to the church and told them to ring for mass so he could preach and sell the indulgences.And the townspeople came,muttering about the pardons,saying that they were forgeries and that the constable himself had let it out while they were quarreling.So,if they hadn't wanted to take any pardons before,they were dead set against it now.

The pardoner went up to the pulpit and began his sermon,trying to stir up the people,telling them that they shouldn't be without the blessings and the forgiveness that would come to them by buying the indulgences.

When he was into the sermon in full swing,the constable came in the church door,and after praying he got up,and with a loud and steady voice he began to speak very solemnly:"My fellow men,let me say a word;afterward,you can listen to whoever you like.I came here with this swindler who's preaching.But he tricked me:he said that if I helped him in his business,we'd split the profits.And now,seeing how it would hurt my conscience and your pocketbooks,I've repented of what I've done.And I want to tell you openly that the indulgences he's selling are forgeries.Don't believe him and don't buy them.I'm not involved with them any longer--either in an open or a hidden way--and from now on I'm giving up my staff,the symbol of my office,and I throw it on the ground so that you'll see I mean it.And if sometime in the future this man is punished for his cheating,I want you to be my witnesses that I'm not in with him and I'm not helping him,but that I told you the truth--that he's a double-dealing liar."

And he finished his speech.

When he'd started,some of the respectable men there wanted to get up and throw the constable out of church so there wouldn't be any scandal.But my master stopped them and told them all not to bother him under penalty of excommunication.He told them to let him say anything he wanted to.So while the constable was saying all that,my master kept quiet,too.

When he stopped speaking,my master told him if he wanted to say anything more he should go ahead.And the constable said,"I could say plenty more about you and your dirty tricks,but I've said enough for now."Then the pardoner knelt down in the pulpit,and with his hands folded,and looking up toward heaven,he said:"Lord God,to Whom nothing is hidden and everything is manifest,for Whom nothing is impossible and everything is possible,Thou knowest the truth of how unjustly I have been accused.In so far as I am concerned,I forgive him so that Thou,Oh Lord,may forgive me.Pay no attention to this man who knows not what he says or does.But the harm that has been done to Thee,I beg and beseech Thee in the name of righteousness that Thou wilt not disregard it.

"Because someone here may have been thinking of taking this holy indulgence,and now,believing that the false words of that man are true,they will not take it.And since that would be so harmful to our fellow men,I beg Thee,Lord,do not disregard it;instead,grant us a miracle here.Let it happen in this way:if what that man says is true--that I am full of malice and falseness--let this pulpit collapse with me in it and plunge one hundred feet into the ground,where neither it nor I shall ever be seen again.But if what I say is true--and he,won over by the devil to distrain and deprive those who are here present from such a great blessing--if he is saying false things,let him be punished and let his malice be known to all."

My reverent master had hardly finished his prayer when the crooked constable fell flat on his face,hitting the floor so hard that it made the whole church echo.Then he began to roar and froth at the mouth and to twist it and his whole face,too,kicking and hitting and rolling around all over the floor.

The people's shouts and cries were so loud that no one could hear anyone else.Some were really terrified.Other people were saying,"God help him."And others said,"He got what was coming to him.Anyone who lies like he did deserves it."

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