登陆注册
15422500000022

第22章 DECISION (4)

Presently he opened the room-door, and stood there uncertain whether to come in. His face was gray and pale; he had a timid, fearful look in his eyes; something almost pitiful to see in a man's face; but that look of despondent uncertainty, of mental and bodily languor, touched his wife's heart. She went to him, and threw herself on his breast, crying out -- 'Oh! Richard, Richard, you should have told me sooner!' And then, in tears, Margaret left her, as she rushed up-stairs to throw herself on her bed, and hide her face in the pillows to stifle the hysteric sobs that would force their way at last, after the rigid self-control of the whole day. How long she lay thus she could not tell. She heard no noise, though the housemaid came in to arrange the room. The affrighted girl stole out again on tip-toe, and went and told Mrs. Dixon that Miss Hale was crying as if her heart would break: she was sure she would make herself deadly ill if she went on at that rate. In consequence of this, Margaret felt herself touched, and started up into a sitting posture; she saw the accustomed room, the figure of Dixon in shadow, as the latter stood holding the candle a little behind her, for fear of the effect on Miss Hale's startled eyes, swollen and blinded as they were. 'Oh, Dixon! I did not hear you come into the room!' said Margaret, resuming her trembling self-restraint. 'Is it very late?' continued she, lifting herself languidly off the bed, yet letting her feet touch the ground without fairly standing down, as she shaded her wet ruffled hair off her face, and tried to look as though nothing were the matter; as if she had only been asleep. 'I hardly can tell what time it is,' replied Dixon, in an aggrieved tone of voice. 'Since your mamma told me this terrible news, when I dressed her for tea, I've lost all count of time. I'm sure I don't know what is to become of us all. When Charlotte told me just now you were sobbing, Miss Hale, I thought, no wonder, poor thing! And master thinking of turning Dissenter at his time of life, when, if it is not to be said he's done well in the Church, he's not done badly after all. I had a cousin, miss, who turned Methodist preacher after he was fifty years of age, and a tailor all his life; but then he had never been able to make a pair of trousers to fit, for as long as he had been in the trade, so it was no wonder; but for master! as I said to missus, "What would poor Sir John have said? he never liked your marrying Mr. Hale, but if he could have known it would have come to this, he would have sworn worse oaths than ever, if that was possible!"' Dixon had been so much accustomed to comment upon Mr. Hale's proceedings to her mistress (who listened to her, or not, as she was in the humour), that she never noticed Margaret's flashing eye and dilating nostril. To hear her father talked of in this way by a servant to her face! 'Dixon,' she said, in the low tone she always used when much excited, which had a sound in it as of some distant turmoil, or threatening storm breaking far away. 'Dixon! you forget to whom you are speaking.' She stood upright and firm on her feet now, confronting the waiting-maid, and fixing her with her steady discerning eye. 'I am Mr. Hale's daughter. Go! You have made a strange mistake, and one that I am sure your own good feeling will make you sorry for when you think about it.' Dixon hung irresolutely about the room for a minute or two. Margaret repeated, 'You may leave me, Dixon. I wish you to go.' Dixon did not know whether to resent these decided words or to cry; either course would have done with her mistress: but, as she said to herself, 'Miss Margaret has a touch of the old gentleman about her, as well as poor Master Frederick; I wonder where they get it from?' and she, who would have resented such words from any one less haughty and determined in manner, was subdued enough to say, in a half humble, half injured tone: 'Mayn't I unfasten your gown, miss, and do your hair?' 'No! not to-night, thank you.' And Margaret gravely lighted her out of the room, and bolted the door. From henceforth Dixon obeyed and admired Margaret. She said it was because she was so like poor Master Frederick;but the truth was, that Dixon, as do many others, liked to feel herself ruled by a powerful and decided nature. Margaret needed all Dixon's help in action, and silence in words; for, for some time, the latter thought it her duty to show her sense of affront by saying as little as possible to her young lady; so the energy came out in doing rather than in speaking A fortnight was a very short time to make arrangements for so serious a removal; as Dixon said, 'Any one but a gentleman--indeed almost any other gentleman--' but catching a look at Margaret's straight, stern brow just here, she coughed the remainder of the sentence away, and meekly took the horehound drop that Margaret offered her, to stop the 'little tickling at my chest, miss.' But almost any one but Mr. Hale would have had practical knowledge enough to see, that in so short a time it would be difficult to fix on any house in Milton-Northern, or indeed elsewhere, to which they could remove the furniture that had of necessity to be taken out of Helstone vicarage. Mrs. Hale, overpowered by all the troubles and necessities for immediate household decisions that seemed to come upon her at once, became really ill, and Margaret almost felt it as a relief when her mother fairly took to her bed, and left the management of affairs to her. Dixon, true to her post of body-guard, attended most faithfully to her mistress, and only emerged from Mrs. Hale's bed-room to shake her head, and murmur to herself in a manner which Margaret did not choose to hear. For, the one thing clear and straight before her, was the necessity for leaving Helstone. Mr. Hale's successor in the living was appointed; and, at any rate, after her father's decision; there must be no lingering now, for his sake, as well as from every other consideration. For he came home every evening more and more depressed, after the necessary leave-taking which he had resolved to have with every individual parishioner. Margaret, inexperienced as she was in all the necessary matter-of-fact business to be got through, did not know to whom to apply for advice. The cook and Charlotte worked away with willing arms and stout hearts at all the moving and packing; and as far as that went, Margaret's admirable sense enabled her to see what was best, and to direct how it should be done. But where were they to go to? In a week they must be gone. Straight to Milton, or where? So many arrangements depended on this decision that Margaret resolved to ask her father one evening, in spite of his evident fatigue and low spirits. He answered: 'My dear! I have really had too much to think about to settle this. What does your mother say? What does she wish? Poor Maria!' He met with an echo even louder than his sigh. Dixon had just come into the room for another cup of tea for Mrs. Hale, and catching Mr. Hale's last words, and protected by his presence from Margaret's upbraiding eyes, made bold to say, 'My poor mistress!' 'You don't think her worse to-day,' said Mr. Hale, turning hastily. 'I'm sure I can't say, sir. It's not for me to judge. The illness seems so much more on the mind than on the body.' Mr. Hale looked infinitely distressed. 'You had better take mamma her tea while it is hot, Dixon,' said Margaret, in a tone of quiet authority. 'Oh! I beg your pardon, miss! My thoughts was otherwise occupied in thinking of my poor----of Mrs. Hale.' 'Papa!' said Margaret, 'it is this suspense that is bad for you both. Of course, mamma must feel your change of opinions: we can't help that,' she continued, softly; 'but now the course is clear, at least to a certain point. And I think, papa, that I could get mamma to help me in planning, if you could tell me what to plan for. She has never expressed any wish in any way, and only thinks of what can't be helped. Are we to go straight to Milton? Have you taken a house there?' 'No,' he replied. 'I suppose we must go into lodgings, and look about for a house. 'And pack up the furniture so that it can be left at the railway station, till we have met with one?' 'I suppose so. Do what you think best. Only remember, we shall have much less money to spend.' They had never had much superfluity, as Margaret knew. She felt that it was a great weight suddenly thrown upon her shoulders. Four months ago, all the decisions she needed to make were what dress she would wear for dinner, and to help Edith to draw out the lists of who should take down whom in the dinner parties at home. Nor was the household in which she lived one that called for much decision. Except in the one grand case of Captain Lennox's offer, everything went on with the regularity of clockwork.

同类推荐
  • 佛说辟除贼害咒经

    佛说辟除贼害咒经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 武王伐纣平话 吕望兴周

    武王伐纣平话 吕望兴周

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 非诗辨妄

    非诗辨妄

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 取因假设论

    取因假设论

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 注华严法界观门

    注华严法界观门

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
热门推荐
  • 血浴苍穹

    血浴苍穹

    一口井,可穿越无尽苍穹;一滴血,可逆行万古。众生觉醒,万族争锋,群圣制霸,乱动寰宇。白痴纪凌,一朝觉醒,从此踩天骄,踏万兽,登临绝巅,浴血苍穹!感谢腾讯文学书评团提供书评支持!
  • 苍蓝色的杀人鬼

    苍蓝色的杀人鬼

    不一样的七夜,不一样的世界,不一样的历史,不一样的一切。命运的羊皮纸,或许早已记录下那被改变过的一切。1.本文只是借鉴了其他世界的世界观,主线基本上不会加入,偶尔几个当属例外,不要介意。2.东方是一定要的。3.11什么的···目前的想法是单女4.最后可能会走生活向···大家别介意,虽然估计没什么人看就是了5.文笔不好,新人开坑,大家见谅,莫怪莫怪。6.死都不会弃坑,弃坑在下就是真死了,大家放心,在下对作品还是很有爱的。7.目测是一周双更,每周六、周日日更一章,有事最少每周一更,节日必更。
  • 呆萌丫头你别跑

    呆萌丫头你别跑

    呆萌丫头,两年前被你逃掉,这次,你一定走不了!
  • AKB0048之初心

    AKB0048之初心

    再一次重新踏上梦想的女孩们你们还记得你们的初心吗?0位之争星际之战Des的阴谋CN世界的真正意义!!究竟演绎应不应该被解放?
  • 丰臣秀吉(四)

    丰臣秀吉(四)

    《丰臣秀吉》讲述了日本战国时期最著名的大名,日本史上首位一统天下的平民英雄丰臣秀吉的传奇人生。丰臣秀吉出身寒微,没有依靠,但他凭借自己的力量,从一介小民,成长为一代权臣。在位时实行的刀狩令、太阁检地等政策具有划时代意义,对日本社会由中世纪封建社会向近代封建社会转化有一定成就,《丰臣秀吉》洋洋洒洒几十万言,内容详尽,翻译语言通俗易懂,有能够兼具日式风格,让读者在领略丰臣秀吉奋斗历程的同时,感悟日本传统文化。当下,人人追求成功,《丰臣秀吉》为我们展示了丰臣秀吉这个成功的范例,具有启示意义。
  • 洛丹伦

    洛丹伦

    一片交织着魔法与斗气的大陆;一群背负着理想与信念的少年;一个记载着辉煌与骄傲的帝国;一支崛起着死亡与灾难的种族。一个传说,一位人物;一位人物,一段历程;一段历程,一串故事;一串故事,一个传说……
  • 无生诀经

    无生诀经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • ROSECLAN

    ROSECLAN

    医生小学徒也会被贵族大少爷看上?她百思不得其解。贵族大少爷也会看上医生小学徒?这位大少爷倒是悠然地打着自己的算盘,令自己的伙伴们摸不着头脑。前往那玫瑰满溢的贵族学院,开启许多贵族不敢再度提及的往事,一场玫瑰风暴即将袭来。每个人都戴着自己的面具,而面具之下,又是一派怎样的风景呢?话虽这么说,日常的校园生活还是得享受的嘛!
  • 花开不尽谢

    花开不尽谢

    她从马尾到卷发,从衬衫到长裙从帆布到高跟,从素颜到淡妆从青涩到成熟,青春也就这么长
  • 央之念期

    央之念期

    钟子期,钟子墨是一对从小长大的兄弟。私生子钟子期因杀人罪判刑,钟家为了掩盖真相将其送往精神病院。两年后子墨心梗猝死,钟家派“林如是”接回子期,“林如是”是钟家司机的女儿。在子墨遗留的日记中他认识了一个女人——仓央,但在接触过程中,子期发现现实中的仓央和日记中的仓央完全不一样。仓央应该是个琴师,但现实中的仓央却是个聋子.....