登陆注册
15419900000005

第5章 THE FIRST(5)

"Or fails....And that is where these new methods of treatment come in.We explore that failure.Together.What the psychoanalyst does-and I will confess that I owe much to the psychoanalyst--what he does is to direct thwarted, disappointed and perplexed people to the realities of their own nature.Which they have been accustomed to ignore and forget.They come to us with high ambitions or lovely illusions about themselves, torn, shredded, spoilt.They are morally denuded.Dreams they hate pursue them; abhorrent desires draw them; they are the prey of irresistible yet uncongenial impulses; they succumb to black despairs.The first thing we ask them is this: 'What else could you expect?'""What else could I expect?" Sir Richmond repeated, looking down on him."H'm!""The wonder is not that you are sluggish, reluctantly unselfish, inattentive, spasmodic.The wonder is that you are ever anything else....Do you realize that a few million generations ago, everything that stirs in us, everything that exalts human life, self-devotions, heroisms, the utmost triumphs of art, the love--for love it is--that makes you and me care indeed for the fate and welfare of all this round world, was latent in the body of some little lurking beast that crawled and hid among the branches of vanished and forgotten Mesozoic trees? A petty egg-laying, bristle-covered beast it was, with no more of the rudiments of a soul than bare hunger, weak lust and fear....People always seem to regard that as a curious fact of no practical importance.It isn't: it's a vital fact of the utmost practical importance.

That is what you are made of.Why should you expect--because a war and a revolution have shocked you--that you should suddenly be able to reach up and touch the sky?""H'm!" said Sir Richmond."Have I been touching the sky!""You are trying to play the part of an honest rich man.""I don't care to see the whole system go smash.""Exactly," said the doctor, before he could prevent himself.

"But is it any good to tell a man that the job he is attempting is above him--that he is just a hairy reptile twice removed--and all that sort of thing?""Well, it saves him from hoping too much and being too greatly disappointed.It recalls him to the proportions of the job.He gets something done by not attempting everything.

...And it clears him up.We get him to look into himself, to see directly and in measurable terms what it is that puts him wrong and holds him back.He's no longer vaguely incapacitated.He knows.""That's diagnosis.That's not treatment.""Treatment by diagnosis.To analyze a mental knot is to untie it.""You propose that I shall spend my time, until the Commission meets, in thinking about myself.I wanted to forget myself.""Like a man who tries to forget that his petrol is running short and a cylinder missing fire....No.Come back to the question of what you are," said the doctor."A creature of the darkness with new lights.Lit and half-blinded by science and the possibilities of controlling the world that it opens out.In that light your will is all for service; you care more for mankind than for yourself.You begin to understand something of the self beyond your self.But it is a partial and a shaded light as yet; a little area about you it makes clear, the rest is still the old darkness--of millions of intense and narrow animal generations....You are like someone who awakens out of an immemorial sleep to find himself in a vast chamber, in a great and ancient house, a great and ancient house high amidst frozen and lifeless mountains--in a sunless universe.You are not alone in it.

You are not lord of all you survey.Your leadership is disputed.The darkness even of the room you are in is full of ancient and discarded but quite unsubjugated powers and purposes....They thrust ambiguous limbs and claws suddenly out of the darkness into the light of your attention.They snatch things out of your hand, they trip your feet and jog your elbow.They crowd and cluster behind you.Wherever your shadow falls, they creep right up to you, creep upon you and struggle to take possession of you.The souls of apes, monkeys, reptiles and creeping things haunt the passages and attics and cellars of this living house in which your consciousness has awakened...."The doctor gave this quotation from his unpublished book the advantages of an abrupt break and a pause.

Sir Richmond shrugged his shoulders and smiled."And you propose a vermin hunt in the old tenement?""The modern man has to be master in his own house.He has to take stock and know what is there.""Three weeks of self vivisection."

"To begin with.Three weeks of perfect honesty with yourself.

As an opening....It will take longer than that if we are to go through with the job."It is a considerable--process."

"It is."

"Yet you shrink from simple things like drugs!""Self-knowledge--without anaesthetics."

"Has this sort of thing ever done anyone any good at all?""It has turned hundreds back to sanity and steady work.""How frank are we going to be? How full are we going to be?

Anyhow--we can break off at any time....We'll try it.

We'll try it....And so for this journey into the west of England....And--if we can get there--I'm not sure that we can get there--into the secret places of my heart.

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 仙之令

    仙之令

    帝落时期破碎的八块仙之令碎片重现世间,在这一世掀起了一场绝世风暴之战……神玄魔幻大陆,万族林立,群雄并起,天骄绝出,鬼才奇人怪杰争霸,乱古由此开启,弹指之间动天乱地。一位少年从异世界降临,由绝境走出,手持无上战弓,脚踏无尽之火炎,身绕大道之无上法术,闯向了风暴之心……
  • 江月满庭霜

    江月满庭霜

    这是一个权利和爱情交织的故事。谁是情场里的赢家?谁会走上权利的巅峰?他们又会付出什么样的代价?故事,从一个十六岁的女孩,开始说起……江月满庭霜,山风应天长。怀昔与君饮,年少竞轻狂。
  • 相思谋:妃常难娶

    相思谋:妃常难娶

    某日某王府张灯结彩,婚礼进行时,突然不知从哪冒出来一个小孩,对着新郎道:“爹爹,今天您的大婚之喜,娘亲让我来还一样东西。”说完提着手中的玉佩在新郎面前晃悠。此话一出,一府宾客哗然,然当大家看清这小孩与新郎如一个模子刻出来的面容时,顿时石化。此时某屋顶,一个绝色女子不耐烦的声音响起:“儿子,事情办完了我们走,别在那磨矶,耽误时间。”新郎一看屋顶上的女子,当下怒火攻心,扔下新娘就往女子所在的方向扑去,吼道:“女人,你给本王站住。”一场爱与被爱的追逐正式开始、、、、、、、
  • 皇帝义女

    皇帝义女

    蓝冰汐,左丞相蓝穆羽嫡长女,因生下来便被太后看中,带入宫中抚养,深得太后,皇上,皇后宠爱。十二岁时被皇帝皇后收为义女,再次进宫,却不想让姨娘与庶妹红了眼,千方百计想至其与死地。她将如何应付这一切?
  • 步步惊情:女人,爷宠你

    步步惊情:女人,爷宠你

    一场身份错乱的邂逅,一番命中注定的纠葛,我们各自背负着自己姓名下潜藏的命运。得到了什么,又失去了什么,乱象之中,可还能找到自己最初的愿想?他,一心只为复仇。步步为营,精心算计,甚至只能做一个永远见不得光的影子,只为一朝赢得天下而手刃仇敌。她是他复仇路上最大的意外,最不按常理出牌的棋子,恨她,折磨她,却是从何时起再不能平淡已对?我算计了天下,将这世上所有人,所有事尽数玩弄于股掌之间。却唯独算错了自己的心,而这,却是我一生中最致命的失误——慕璃。我只想有一个人能与我真心相对,不掺杂任何,只因为我是我,而喜欢我——云婧川。【情节虚构,请勿模仿】
  • 夏凉月满之—梦华胥倾凰心

    夏凉月满之—梦华胥倾凰心

    她在满月之夜重生了。在这个崇尚实力的锦夜大陆,来自现代的她以丞相之女的身份生存着。前世的仇恨,使她重新找回杀手的快意。以“满月”为名,她再次霸气外漏,叱咤风云。在这个世界,她必须活下去。她还要舒服地活下去。胜者为王,弱者服强。她要自己能一手遮天,爱恨分明。于是,她用不容置疑的实力做地基,用无冰冷狠毒的手段铺出大路,用自己永恒的高傲与竖起一道道荆棘。她一步一个脚印,用胜者的狂妄在这个世界中走出一条通天大路来。
  • 我喜欢你:大神求放过

    我喜欢你:大神求放过

    在游戏里的苏欣歪打正着的被大神勾搭了,大神日日调戏她,谁知道这大神竟是隔壁的校草风斩,对着大神的强攻不舍,某日————苏欣被逼在墙角大叫,你你你你你要干什么,风斩邪魅一笑,你猜啊。(片段)风斩这样不好,有什么不好的?说完还在苏欣耳边轻轻的咬着,用手抚摸着苏欣的腰,接着吻上了她的唇,苏欣全身都软了,风斩还用手揉着苏欣的大白兔,此时的苏欣很崩溃,自己怎么惹上了这样的狼?
  • 生化求生指南

    生化求生指南

    一个十七岁的高中生,他没有超能力,也没有什么奇遇,他只是普通人中的一份子,突如其来的灾难一样是让他措手不及,他只想知道父母家人是否安好,为了活下去他想尽了办法,最终会是什么样的结局等着他呢?
  • 凯源之夜店王子追爱记

    凯源之夜店王子追爱记

    这个夏天我们一起毕业~这一天都是蓝天白云,随着相机“卡!”一声,印在照片里的是我们最美好的笑容。
  • 我的郁金香姑娘

    我的郁金香姑娘

    每个人心中都有一个如同郁金香花一般圣洁的姑娘,无论何时她都绽放在我们心中的那片净土上,直到陪伴我们生老病死!