A good thing happened down here the other day, said a miner from New Hampshire to me."A man of Boston dressin' went through there, and at one of the stations there wasn't any mules.Says the man who was fixed out to kill in his Boston dressin', 'Where's them mules?' Says the driver, 'Them mules is into the sage brush.You go catch 'em--that's wot YOU do.' Says the man of Boston dressin', 'Oh no!' Says the driver! 'Oh, yes!' and he took his long coach-whip and licked the man of Boston dressin' till he went and caught them mules.How does that strike you for a joke?"It didn't strike me as much of a joke to pay a hundred and seventy-five dollars in gold fare, and then be horse-whipped by stage-drivers, for declining to chase mules.But people's ideas of humor differ in regard to shrewdness which "reminds me of a little story."Sitting in a New England country store one day I overheard the following dialogue between two brothers:
"Say, Bill, wot you done with that air sorrel mare of yourn?""Sold her," said William, with a smile of satisfaction.
"Wot'd you git?"
"Hund'd an' fifty dollars, cash deown!"
"Show! Hund'd an' fifty for that kickin' spavin'd critter! Who'd you sell her to?""Sold her to mother!"
"Wot!" exclaimed brother No.1, "did you railly sell that kickin'
spavin'd critter to mother? Wall, you AIR a shrewd one!"A Sensation--Arrival by the Overland Stage of two Missouri girls, who had come unescorted all the way through.They are going to Nevada territory to join their father.They are pretty, but, merciful heavens! how they throw the meat and potatoes down their throats."This is the first squar' meal we've had since we left Rocky Thompson's," said the eldest.Then addressing herself to me, she said:
"Air you the literary man?"
I politely replied that I was one of "them fellers.""Wall, don't make fun of our clothes in the papers.We air goin'
right through in these here clothes, WE air! We ain't goin' to RAGOUT till we git to Nevady! Pass them sassiges!"4.12.BRIGHAM YOUNG.
Brigham Young sends word I may see him tomorrow.So I go to bed singing the popular Mormon hymn:
"Let the chorus still be sung, Long live Brother Brigham Young, And blessed be the vale of Desere't--ret--ret!
And blessed be the vale of Deseret."
At two o'clock the next afternoon Mr.Hiram B.Clawson, Brigham Young's son-in-law and chief business manager, calls for me with the Prophet's private sleigh, and we start for that distinguished person's block.
I am shown into the Prophet's chief office.He comes forward, greets me cordially, and introduces me to several influential Mormons who are present.
Brigham Young is 62 years old, of medium height, and with sandy hair and whiskers.An active, iron man, with a clear sharp eye.
A man of consummate shrewdness--of great executive ability.He was born in the State of Vermont, and so by the way was Heber C.
Kimball, who will wear the Mormon Belt when Brigham leaves the ring.
Brigham Young is a man of great natural ability.If you ask me, How pious is he? I treat it as a conundrum, and give it up.
Personally he treated me with marked kindness throughout my sojourn in Utah.
His power in Utah is quite as absolute as that of any living sovereign, yet he uses it with such consummate shrewdness that his people are passionately devoted to him.
He was an Elder at the first formal Mormon "stake" in this country, at Kirtland, Ohio, and went to Nauvoo with Joseph Smith.That distinguished Mormon handed his mantle and the Prophet business over to Brigham when he died at Nauvoo.
Smith did a more flourishing business in the Prophet line than B.Y.
does.Smith used to have his little Revelation almost every day--sometimes two before dinner.B.Y.only takes one once in a while.
The gateway of his block is surmounted by a brass American eagle, and they say ("they say" here means anti-Mormons) that he receives his spiritual dispatches through this piece of patriotic poultry.
They also say that he receives revelations from a stuffed white calf that is trimmed with red ribbons and kept in an iron box.Idon't suppose these things are true.Rumor says that when the Lion House was ready to be shingled, Brigham received a message from the Lord stating that the carpenters must all take hold and shingle it, and not charge a red cent for their services.Such carpenters as refused to shingle would go to hell, and no postponement on account of the weather.They say that Brigham, whenever a train of emigrants arrives in Salt Lake City, orders all the women to march up and down before his block, while he stands on the portico of the Lion House and gobbles up the prettiest ones.
He is an immensely wealthy man.His wealth is variously estimated at from ten to twenty millions of dollars.He owns saw mills, grist mills, woollen factories, brass and iron foundries, farms, brick-yards, &c., and superintends them all in person.A man in Utah individually owns what he grows and makes, with the exception of a one-tenth part: that must go to the Church; and Brigham Young, as the first President, is the Church's treasurer.Gentiles, of course, say that he abuses this blind confidence of his people, and speculates with their money, and absorbs the interest if he doesn't the principle.The Mormons deny this, and say that whatever of their money he does use is for the good of the Church; that he defrays the expenses of emigrants from far over the seas; that he is foremost in all local enterprises tending to develop the resources of the territory, an that, in short, he is incapable of wrong in any shape.
