BOSWELL.'Lord Mansfield does not.'JOHNSON.'Sir,if Lord Mansfield were in a company of General Officers and Admirals who have been in service,he would shrink;he'd wish to creep under the table.'BOSWELL.'No;he'd think he could TRY them all.'
JOHNSON.'Yes,if he could catch them:but they'd try him much sooner.No,Sir;were Socrates and Charles the Twelfth of Sweden both present in any company,and Socrates to say,"Follow me,and hear a lecture on philosophy;"and Charles,laying his hand on his sword,to say,"Follow me,and dethrone the Czar;"a man would be ashamed to follow Socrates.Sir,the impression is universal;yet it is strange.'
He talked of Mr.Charles Fox,of whose abilities he thought highly,but observed,that he did not talk much at our CLUB.I have heard Mr.Gibbon remark,'that Mr.Fox could not be afraid of Dr.
Johnson;yet he certainly was very shy of saying any thing in Dr.
Johnson's presence.'
He expressed great indignation at the imposture of the Cock-lane Ghost,and related,with much satisfaction,how he had assisted in detecting the cheat,and had published an account of it in the news-papers.Upon this subject I incautiously offended him,by pressing him with too many questions,and he shewed his displeasure.I apologised,saying that 'I asked questions in order to be instructed and entertained;I repaired eagerly to the fountain;but that the moment he gave me a hint,the moment he put a lock upon the well,I desisted.'--'But,Sir,(said he),that is forcing one to do a disagreeable thing:'and he continued to rate me.'Nay,Sir,(said I,)when you have put a lock upon the well,so that I can no longer drink,do not make the fountain of your wit play upon me and wet me.'
He sometimes could not bear being teazed with questions.I was once present when a gentleman asked so many as,'What did you do,Sir?''What did you say,Sir?'that he at last grew enraged,and said,'I will not be put to the QUESTION.Don't you consider,Sir,that these are not the manners of a gentleman?I will not be baited with WHAT,and WHY;what is this?what is that?why is a cow's tail long?why is a fox's tail bushy?'The gentleman,who was a good deal out of countenance,said,'Why,Sir,you are so good,that I venture to trouble you.'Johnson.'Sir,my being so GOOD is no reason why you should be so ILL.'
He talked with an uncommon animation of travelling into distant countries;that the mind was enlarged by it,and that an acquisition of dignity of character was derived from it.He expressed a particular enthusiasm with respect to visiting the wall of China.I catched it for the moment,and said I really believed I should go and see the wall of China had I not children,of whom it was my duty to take care.'Sir,(said he,)by doing so,you would do what would be of importance in raising your children to eminence.There would be a lustre reflected upon them from your spirit and curiosity.They would be at all times regarded as the children of a man who had gone to view the wall of China.I am serious,Sir.'
When we had left Mr.Scott's,he said 'Will you go home with me?'
'Sir,(said I,)it is late;but I'll go with you for three minutes.'JOHNSON.'Or four.'We went to Mrs.Williams's room,where we found Mr.Allen the printer,who was the landlord of his house in Bolt-court,a worthy,obliging man,and his very old acquaintance;and what was exceedingly amusing,though he was of a very diminutive size,he used,even in Johnson's presence,to imitate the stately periods and slow and solemn utterance of the great man.--I this evening boasted,that although I did not write what is called stenography,or short-hand,in appropriated characters devised for the purpose,I had a method of my own of writing half words,and leaving out some altogether so as yet to keep the substance and language of any discourse which I had heard so much in view,that I could give it very completely soon after Ihad taken it down.
On Sunday,April 12,I found him at home before dinner.He and I,and Mrs.Williams,went to dine with the Reverend Dr.Percy.
And here I shall record a scene of too much heat between Dr.
Johnson and Dr.Percy,which I should have suppressed,were it not that it gave occasion to display the truely tender and benevolent heart of Johnson,who,as soon as he found a friend was at all hurt by any thing which he had 'said in his wrath,'was not only prompt and desirous to be reconciled,but exerted himself to make ample reparation.
Books of Travels having been mentioned,Johnson praised Pennant very highly,as he did at Dunvegan,in the Isle of Sky.Dr.Percy,knowing himself to be the heir male of the ancient Percies,and having the warmest and most dutiful attachment to the noble House of Northumberland,could not sit quietly and hear a man praised,who had spoken disrespectfully of Alnwick-Castle and the Duke's pleasure grounds,especially as he thought meanly of his travels.
He therefore opposed Johnson eagerly.JOHNSON.'Pennant in what he has said of Alnwick,has done what he intended;he has made you very angry.'PERCY.'He has said the garden is TRIM,which is representing it like a citizen's parterre,when the truth is,there is a very large extent of fine turf and gravel walks.'JOHNSON.
'According to your own account,Sir,Pennant is right.It IS trim.
Here is grass cut close,and gravel rolled smooth.Is not that trim?The extent is nothing against that;a mile may be as trim as a square yard.Your extent puts me in mind of the citizen's enlarged dinner,two pieces of roast-beef,and two puddings.There is no variety,no mind exerted in laying out the ground,no trees.'
