登陆注册
14827300000008

第8章

He read and read again these lines, with only the sense of their insufficiency in doing the effect of the bitterness in his heart. If the letter was insulting, it was by no means as insulting as he would have liked to make it. Whether it would be wounding enough was something that depended upon the person whom he wished to wound. All that was proud and vain and cruel in him surged up at the thought of the trick that had been played upon him, and all that was sweet and kind and gentle in him, when he believed the trick was a genuine appeal, turned to their counter qualities. Yet, feeble and inadequate as his letter was, he knew that he could not do more or worse by trying, and he so much feared that by waiting he might do less and better that he hurried it into the post at once. If his mother had been at hand he would have shown it her, though he might not have been ruled by her judgment of it. He was glad that she was not with him, for either she would have had her opinion of what would be more telling, or she would have insisted upon his delaying any sort of reply, and he could not endure the thought of difference or delay.

He asked himself whether he should let her see the rough first draft of his letter or not, and he decided that he would not. But when she came into his study on her return he showed it her.

She read it in silence, and then she seemed to temporize in asking, "Where are her two letters?"

"I've sent them back with the answer."

His mother let the paper drop from her hands. "Philip! You haven't sent this!"

"Yes, I have. It wasn't what I wanted to make it, but I wished to get the detestable experience out of my mind, and it was the best I could do at the moment. Don't you like it?"

"Oh--" She seemed beginning to say something, but without saying anything she took the fallen leaf up and read it again.

"Well!" he demanded, with impatience.

"Oh, you may have been right. I hope you've not been wrong."

"Mother!"

"She deserved the severest things you could say; and yet--"

"Well?"

"Perhaps she was punished enough already."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't like your being-vindictive."

"Vindictive?"

"Being so terribly just, then." She added, at his blank stare, "This is killing, Philip."

He gave a bitter laugh. "I don't think it will kill her. She isn't that kind."

"She's a girl," his mother said, with a kind of sad absence.

"But not a single-minded girl, you warned me. I wish I could have taken your warning. It would have saved me from playing the fool before myself and giving myself away to Armiger, and letting him give himself away.

I don't think Miss Brown will suffer much before she dies. She will 'get together,' as she calls it, with that other girl and have 'a real good time' over it. You know the village type and the village conditions, where the vulgar ignorance of any larger world is so thick you could cut it with a knife. Don't be troubled by my vindictiveness or my justice, mother! I begin to think I have done justice and not fallen short of it, as I was afraid."

Mrs. Verrian sighed, and again she gave his letter back to her son.

"Perhaps you are right, Philip. She is probably so tough as not to feel it very painfully."

"She's not so tough but she'll be very glad to get out of it so lightly.

She has had a useful scare, and I've done her a favor in making the scare a sharp one. I suppose," Verrian mused, "that she thinks I've kept copies of her letters."

"Yes. Why didn't you?" his mother asked.

Verrian laughed, only a little less bitterly than before. "I shall begin to believe you're all alike, mother.

I didn't keep copies of her letters because I wanted to get her and her letters out of my mind, finally and forever. Besides, I didn't choose. to emulate her duplicity by any sort of dissimulation.

"I see what you mean," his mother said. "And, of course, you have taken the only honorable way."

Then they were both silent for a time, thinking their several thoughts.

Verrian broke the silence to say, "I wish I knew what sort of 'other girl' it was that she 'got together with.'"

"Why?"

"Because she wrote a more cultivated letter than this magnanimous creature who takes all the blame to herself."

"Then you don't believe they're both the same?"

"They are both the same in stationery and chirography, but not in literature."

"I hope you won't get to thinking about her, then," his mother entreated, intelligibly but not definitely.

"Not seriously," Verrian reassured her. "I've had my medicine."

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 沧海啸

    沧海啸

    十年苦乐心意表,虚空海上仇皆抛。海渊谷上浪涛涛,立教混元真情告。沧海笑,沧海啸,向天一啸仇皆消。恩怨了,债难消,返本归源任逍遥。
  • 修仙之穿书女配

    修仙之穿书女配

    第一次,穿越到异世大陆,被最信赖的人背叛,惨死,第二次穿越,被最依赖的人背叛,呵,这一世,她绝不再轻易相信任何人,啊咧,谁能告诉她,这位赖在她身边不走的腹黑妖孽是谁?喂喂,男主大人,你爱的不是女主吗?说喜欢我这个炮灰女配是想闹哪样?
  • 医经天书

    医经天书

    追寻医道,再现中医辉煌,让华夏元素引领世界潮流“嘿,菲尔普斯,你别只是拔火罐了,听说了吗,东方还有更伟大奢侈品,老干妈。”“哦,当然,老干妈我当然知道,不过据说老干妈和马应龙痔疮膏更配哦。”“哇,原来你也知道,神秘的东方巫术,听说他们不仅能治痔疮,还可以治口臭,治脱发,甚至连感冒都不用等七天,一天就能好了……”
  • 百业俏学生

    百业俏学生

    俗语说三百六十行,行行出状元。但有谁见过三百六十行,行行状元是一人。欲知具体事宜,且看月扬白塔笔下生风弄风骚。~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~本书使用第一人称手法,目前作品大多是第三人称也就是所谓的上帝视角。但其实无论第一人称还是第三人称各有各的好处,各有各的缺点。所以各位读者大大们不必纠结于此。另外YY无罪,但是作者要合理的YY,保证故事行云流水,没有瑕疵。如有瑕疵还请各位读者大大指正。~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~最后新人新书,急需大家的收藏和推荐。我保证我不断更,每天最少二章,专心码字。所以就请各位大大留下宝贵的票票,其实对您来说是举手之劳,但对我来说却是最大的鼓励。
  • 龙珠之主宰宇宙

    龙珠之主宰宇宙

    徐徐托腮望着天空:当我经历了这么多修行,挑战过宇宙帝王,接受过人造人的挑战,打败过宇宙的噩梦,甚至将要突破神的瓶颈,可是为什么我还是不满足…是因为我体内的伪-传说中的超级赛亚人之血吗…(群号540717160,有没有帅逼?!)
  • 诛天剑尊

    诛天剑尊

    五百年前,剑尊江天羽为抗域外天魔,殒命葬剑山!五百年后,他重塑身躯,再度归来,这一世,他要恩仇必报,重登武道巅峰!
  • 我在异界当剑客

    我在异界当剑客

    别人到异界,重生个什么官二代,富二代要么天才要么人才要么废材变成人才,在多个二,变成天才我怎么就是被踩这个踩完,那个踩我不服啊!
  • 灵镜战警

    灵镜战警

    “是的!你可以把这里当做现实版的X战警,但是你要知道的是,这里有更完整的体系,更复杂的技能,更频繁的冲突,当然,还有更强大的敌人!”——犇教官。“灵人类与智人类的矛盾和冲突,延绵了几千年。神镜局的存在,就是为了双方能和平地生活。”——楠香城主。“叶扬,为什么你的灵镜跟我们的不一样?”“对呀对呀,上面刻着龙呢,里面不会是龙族的神兽吧!”——地下城的小伙伴们
  • 今天怎样当好校长

    今天怎样当好校长

    本书从如何提高校长领导能力,如何进行教学管理,如何创新,新时期如何建设学校文化,如何进行学校品牌管理等方面展开分析,并对引起关注的校长专业化发展问题展开阐述,对校长专业化与校长职业化的联系和区别进行详细的讨论。
  • 葬在生死簿的爱

    葬在生死簿的爱

    传说中地狱最恐怖的地方“鬼之梦!”哪里封印着世间最恐怖的恶鬼妖魔,可就算是如此恐怖的遭遇还是不让让她忘却,在他临死的一瞬间为他牺牲了一切。黄泉街、鬼神部、牛头组、牛头小分队的少年鬼神们,一个个善良的鬼神们又怎么去人间捉拿恶鬼有些鬼神会因为自己的善良修改生死簿!有种男人叫世界最强的男人。