HE THAT is only real, had need have exceed- ing great parts of virtue; as the stone had need to be rich, that is set without foil. But if a man mark it well, it is, in praise and commenda-tion of men, as it is in gettings and gains: for the proverb is true, That light gains make heavy purses; for light gains come thick, whereas great, come but now and then. So it is true, that small matters win great commendation, because they are continually in use and in note: whereas the occasion of any great virtue, cometh but on festi-vals. Therefore it doth much add to a man's reputa-tion, and is (as Queen Isabella said) like perpetual letters commendatory, to have good forms. To at-tain them, it almost sufficeth not to despise them;for so shall a man observe them in others; and let him trust himself with the rest. For if he labor too much to express them, he shall lose their grace;which is to be natural and unaffected. Some men's behavior is like a verse, wherein every syllable is measured; how can a man comprehend great mat-ters, that breaketh his mind too much, to small observations? Not to use ceremonies at all, is to teach others not to use them again; and so dimin-isheth respect to himself; especially they be not to be omitted, to strangers and formal natures; but the dwelling upon them, and exalting them above the moon, is not only tedious, but doth diminish the faith and credit of him that speaks. And cer-tainly, there is a kind of conveying, of effectual and imprinting passages amongst compliments, which is of singular use, if a man can hit upon it.
Amongst a man's peers, a man shall be sure of familiarity; and therefore it is good, a little to keep state. Amongst a man's inferiors one shall be sure of reverence; and therefore it is good, a little to be familiar. He that is too much in anything, so that he giveth another occasion of satiety, maketh him-self cheap. To apply one's self to others, is good; so it be with demonstration, that a man doth it upon regard, and not upon facility. It is a good precept generally, in seconding another, yet to add some-what of one's own: as if you will grant his opinion, let it be with some distinction; if you will follow his motion, let it be with condition; if you allow his counsel, let it be with alleging further reason.
Men had need beware, how they be too perfect in compliments; for be they never so sufficient other-wise, their enviers will be sure to give them that attribute, to the disadvantage of their greater vir-tues. It is loss also in business, to be too full of re-spects, or to be curious, in observing times and opportunities. Solomon saith, He that considereth the wind, shall not sow, and he that looketh to the clouds, shall not reap. A wise man will make more opportunities, than he finds. Men's behavior should be, like their apparel, not too strait or point device, but free for exercise or motion.
Of Praise Of Praise PRAISE is the reflection of virtue; but it is as the glass or body, which giveth the reflec-tion. If it be from the common people, it is com-monly false and naught; and rather followeth vain persons, than virtuous. For the common people understand not many excellent virtues. The lowest virtues draw praise from them; the middle virtues work in them astonishment or admiration; but of the highest virtues, they have no sense of perceiv-ing at all. But shows, and species virtutibus similes, serve best with them. Certainly fame is like a river, that beareth up things light and swoln, and drowns things weighty and solid. But if persons of quality and judgment concur, then it is (as the Scripture saith) nomen bonum instar unguenti fragrantis.
It fireth all round about, and will not easily away.
For the odors of ointments are more durable, than those of flowers. There be so many false points of praise, that a man may justly hold it a suspect.