登陆注册
15419200000028

第28章 CAPTAIN KIDD MEETS WITH AN OBSTACLE(3)

'Bassanio has a most beautiful wife, gentlemen,' said Sir Walter, 'and he wouldn't think of parting with her under any circumstances;therefore let us keep our intentions a secret from him.' I did not hear whom the gentleman married, madame; but the others, Prince Hamlet, the Duke of Buckingham, and Louis the Fourteenth, all agreed that Mrs.Bassanio was too beautiful a person to be separated from, and that it was better, therefore, to keep Bassanio in the dark as to their little enterprise until it was too late for him to interfere."A pink glow of pleasure suffused the lovely countenance of the cross-examiner, and it did not require a very sharp eye to see that the wily Kidd had completely won her over to his side.On the other hand, Elizabeth's brow became as corrugated as her ruff, and the spirit of the pirate shivered to the core as he turned and gazed upon that glowering face.

"Sir Walter agreed to that, did he?" snapped Elizabeth."And yet he was willing to part with--ah--his sister.""Well, your Majesty," began Kidd, hesitatingly, "you see it was this way: Sir Walter--er--did say that, but--ah--he--ah--but he added that he of course merely judged--er--this man Bassanio's feelings by his own in parting from his sister--""Did he say sister?" cried Elizabeth.

"Well--no--not in those words," shuffled Kidd, perceiving quickly wherein his error lay, "but--ah--I jumped at the conclusion, seeing his intense enthusiasm for the lady's beauty and--er--intellectual qualities, that he referred to you, and it is from yourself that Ihave gained my knowledge as to the fraternal, not to say sororal, relationship that exists between you.""That man's a diplomat from Diplomaville!" muttered Sir Henry Morgan, who, with Abeuchapeta and Conrad, was listening at the port without.

"He is that," said Abeuchapeta, "but he can't last much longer.He's perspiring like a pitcher of ice-water on a hot day, and a spirit of his size and volatile nature can't stand much of that without evaporating.If you will observe him closely you will see that his left arm already has vanished into thin air.""By Jove!" whispered Conrad, "that's a fact! If they don't let up on him he'll vanish.He's getting excessively tenuous about the top of his head."All of which was only too true.Subjected to a scrutiny which he had little expected, the deceitful ambassador of the thieving band was rapidly dissipating, and, as those without had so fearsomely noted, was in imminent danger of complete sublimation, which, in the case of one possessed of so little elementary purity, meant nothing short of annihilation.Fortunately for Kidd, however, his wonderful tact had stemmed the tide of suspicion.Elizabeth was satisfied with his explanation, and in the minds of at least three of the most influential ladies on board, Portia, Xanthippe, and Elizabeth, he had become a creature worthy of credence, which meant that he had nothing more to fear.

"I am prepared, your Majesty," said Elizabeth, addressing Cleopatra, "to accept from this time on the gentleman's word.The little that he has already told us is hall-marked with truth.I should like to ask, however, one more question, and that is how our gentleman friends expected to embark us upon this voyage without letting us into the secret?""Oh, as for that," replied Kidd, with a deep-drawn sigh of relief, for he too had noticed the gradual evaporation of his arm and the incipient etherization of his cranium--"as for that, it was simple enough.There was to have been a day set apart for ladies' day at the club, and when you were all on board we were quietly to weigh anchor and start.The fact that you had anticipated the day, of your own volition, was telephoned by my scouts to me at my headquarters, and that news was by me transmitted by messenger to Sir Walter at Charon's Glen Island, where the long-talked-of fight between Samson and Goliath was taking place.Raleigh immediately replied, 'Good!

Start at once.Paris first.Unlimited credit.Love to Elizabeth.'

Wherefore, ladies," he added, rising from his chair and walking to the door--"wherefore you are here and in my care.Make yourselves comfortable, and with the aid of the fashion papers which you have already received prepare yourselves for the joys that await you.

With the aid of Madame Recamier and Baedeker's Paris, which you will find in the library, it will be your own fault if when you arrive there you resemble a great many less fortunate women who don't know what they want."With these words Kidd disappeared through the door, and fainted in the arms of Sir Henry Morgan.The strain upon him had been too great.

"A charming fellow," said Portia, as the pirate disappeared.

"Most attractive," said Elizabeth.

"Handsome, too, don't you think?" asked Helen of Troy.

"And truthful beyond peradventure," observed Xanthippe, as she reflected upon the words the captain had attributed to Socrates."Ididn't believe him at first, but when he told me what my sweet-tempered philosopher had said, I was convinced.""He's a sweet child," interposed Mrs.Noah, fondly."One of my favorite grandchildren.""Which makes it embarrassing for me to say," cried Cassandra, starting up angrily, "that he is a base caitiff!"Had a bomb been dropped in the middle of the room, it could not have created a greater sensation than the words of Cassandra.

"What?" cried several voices at once."A caitiff?""A caitiff with a capital K," retorted Cassandra."I know that, because while he was telling his story I was listening to it with one ear and looking forward into the middle of next week with the other--I mean the other eye--and I saw--"

"Yes, you saw?" cried Cleopatra.

"I saw that he was deceiving us.Mark my words, ladies, he is a base caitiff," replied Cassandra--"a base caitiff.""What did you see?" cried Elizabeth, excitedly.

"This," said Cassandra, and she began a narration of future events which I must defer to the next chapter.Meanwhile his associates were endeavoring to restore the evaporated portions of the prostrated Kidd's spirit anatomy by the use of a steam-atomizer, but with indifferent success.Kidd's training had not fitted him for an intellectual combat with superior women, and he suffered accordingly.

同类推荐
  • 佛说楼阁正法甘露鼓经

    佛说楼阁正法甘露鼓经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 景岳全书

    景岳全书

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 桃花艳史

    桃花艳史

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 桃花女阴阳斗传

    桃花女阴阳斗传

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 悟真篇注释

    悟真篇注释

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
热门推荐
  • 开冲床的人

    开冲床的人

    本书主要内容包括开冲床的人、国家订单、成长的仪式、梅雨、短歌行、白斑马……《深圳当代短小说8大家:开冲床的人》是深圳当代短小说8大家之一。
  • 风云仙变

    风云仙变

    三千年前,我分别放生了鲤鱼,帮助了灵狐,救了女孩。三千年后,鲤鱼化成真龙,灵狐成为妖皇,女孩成为九天女帝,而我却成了废弃少爷。故事从一个三花巨鼎天资少年身上开始......
  • 修真全能教师

    修真全能教师

    被学生整蛊,被美女房东催租,被绿茶婊女朋友劈腿……无名古玉破碎,得鸿钧诀,唐平的屌丝人生开始逆袭!数学,语文,英语?不不不,地理,历史,政治,体育,音乐我也能教!我的学生都是低能儿?不不不,没有笨蛋学生,只有无能的老师。清纯校花,火辣警花,高傲御姐,霸道女总裁?“你们不要靠近我,我的心愿是……世界和平!”
  • tfboys之伴你十年

    tfboys之伴你十年

    三个身世不凡的少女遇上了另一半,将会擦出怎样的爱情火花
  • Personal Memoirs of U.S.Grant

    Personal Memoirs of U.S.Grant

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 网游之神之手

    网游之神之手

    左手光明,右手黑暗。他,手握光与暗,善与恶的力量。他,被世人尊称为“神之手”!这就是天启的故事。
  • 宠爱

    宠爱

    本书是一本女性情感书,分别从宠爱自己、宠爱爱情、宠爱他人等多方面阐述了宠爱本身散发的魅力,希望通过此书使众多女性明白,宠爱是一种能力,是一种习惯,与条件无关,与时间无关,无论何时,遭遇了怎样的挫折,都应该用一颗小女孩的心去面对,去宠爱。
  • 单恋太寂寞(FOURQUEENS系列之二)

    单恋太寂寞(FOURQUEENS系列之二)

    [花雨授权]单恋,像观看一部别人主演的电影。她不是主角,可是——她爱他。偶尔偷偷幻想,有天他也会爱她——虽然,她清楚他们之间的距离,可,这一次她要任性一回,如果还是不能换取他关注的目光,那,这寂寞的单恋,何时是尽头?
  • 诗人主客图

    诗人主客图

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 小宫女上位记

    小宫女上位记

    穿越成八品小宫女,柳朦胧只愿平安混到放出宫的那天,奈何,一时色迷心窍,强压了当世第一美正太......那那那,正所谓有仇不报非君子,于是,色胆包天的小宫女,就被失身愤懑的正太皇子,强拽着挡刀挡枪,一同踏上凶险上位之路。正太皇子有言:朦胧,你若不死,便继续为我挡箭柳朦胧哭:不就是当年睡你半时辰,何故换我半生安稳