They whistle Whew! A plague upon you all! Give me my horse, you rogues; give me my horse, and be hanged! PRINCE HENRY Peace, ye fat-guts! lie down; lay thine ear close to the ground and list if thou canst hear the tread of travellers. FALSTAFF Have you any levers to lift me up again, being down?
'Sblood, I'll not bear mine own flesh so far afoot again for all the coin in thy father's exchequer.
What a plague mean ye to colt me thus? PRINCE HENRY Thou liest; thou art not colted, thou art uncolted. FALSTAFF I prithee, good Prince Hal, help me to my horse, good king's son. PRINCE HENRY Out, ye rogue! shall I be your ostler? FALSTAFF Go, hang thyself in thine own heir-apparent garters! If I be ta'en, I'll peach for this. An Ihave not ballads made on you all and sung to filthy tunes, let a cup of sack be my poison: when a jest is so forward, and afoot too! I hate it.
Enter GADSHILL, BARDOLPH and PETO GADSHILL Stand. FALSTAFF So I do, against my will. POINS O, 'tis our setter: I know his voice.
Bardolph, what news? BARDOLPH Case ye, case ye; on with your vizards:
there 's money of the king's coming down the hill; 'tis going to the king's exchequer. FALSTAFF You lie, ye rogue; 'tis going to the king's tavern. GADSHILL There's enough to make us all. FALSTAFF To be hanged. PRINCE HENRY Sirs, you four shall front them in the narrow lane;Ned Poins and I will walk lower: if they 'scape from your encounter, then they light on us. PETO How many be there of them? GADSHILL Some eight or ten. FALSTAFF 'Zounds, will they not rob us? PRINCE HENRY What, a coward, Sir John Paunch? FALSTAFF Indeed, I am not John of Gaunt, your grandfather;but yet no coward, Hal. PRINCE HENRY Well, we leave that to the proof. POINS Sirrah Jack, thy horse stands behind the hedge:
when thou needest him, there thou shalt find him.
Farewell, and stand fast. FALSTAFF Now cannot I strike him, if I should be hanged. PRINCE HENRY Ned, where are our disguises? POINS Here, hard by: stand close.
Exeunt PRINCE HENRY and POINS FALSTAFF Now, my masters, happy man be his dole, say I:
every man to his business.
Enter the Travellers First Traveller Come, neighbour: the boy shall lead our horses down the hill; we'll walk afoot awhile, and ease our legs. Thieves Stand! Travellers Jesus bless us! FALSTAFF Strike; down with them; cut the villains'
throats:
ah! whoreson caterpillars! bacon-fed knaves! they hate us youth: down with them: fleece them. Travellers O, we are undone, both we and ours for ever! FALSTAFF Hang ye, gorbellied knaves, are ye undone?
No, ye fat chuffs: I would your store were here! On, bacons, on! What, ye knaves! young men must live.
You are Grand-jurors, are ye? we'll jure ye, 'faith.
Here they rob them and bind them. Exeunt Re-enter PRINCE HENRY and POINS PRINCE HENRY The thieves have bound the true men. Now could thou and I rob the thieves and go merrily to London, it would be argument for a week, laughter for a month and a good jest for ever. POINS Stand close; I hear them coming.
Enter the Thieves again FALSTAFF Come, my masters, let us share, and then to horse before day. An the Prince and Poins be not two arrant cowards, there's no equity stirring: there's no more valour in that Poins than in a wild-duck. PRINCE HENRY Your money! POINS Villains!
As they are sharing, the Prince and Poins set upon them; they all run away; and Falstaff, after a blow or two, runs away too, leaving the booty behind them PRINCE HENRY Got with much ease. Now merrily to horse:
The thieves are all scatter'd and possess'd with fear So strongly that they dare not meet each other;Each takes his fellow for an officer.
Away, good Ned. Falstaff sweats to death, And lards the lean earth as he walks along:
Were 't not for laughing, I should pity him. POINS How the rogue roar'd!
Exeunt SCENE III. Warkworth castle Enter HOTSPUR, solus, reading a letter HOTSPUR 'But for mine own part, my lord, I could be well contented to be there, in respect of the love Ibear your house.' He could be contented: why is he not, then? In respect of the love he bears our house:
he shows in this, he loves his own barn better than he loves our house. Let me see some more. 'The purpose you undertake is dangerous;'--why, that's certain: 'tis dangerous to take a cold, to sleep, to drink; but I tell you, my lord fool, out of this nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety.
'The purpose you undertake is dangerous; the friends you have named uncertain; the time itself unsorted;and your whole plot too light for the counterpoise of so great an opposition.' Say you so, say you so?
I say unto you again, you are a shallow cowardly hind, and you lie. What a lack-brain is this! By the Lord, our plot is a good plot as ever was laid; our friends true and constant: a good plot, good friends, and full of expectation; an excellent plot, very good friends. What a frosty-spirited rogue is this! Why, my lord of York commends the plot and the general course of action. 'Zounds, an I were now by this rascal, I could brain him with his lady's fan.
Is there not my father, my uncle and myself? lord Edmund Mortimer, My lord of York and Owen Glendower?
is there not besides the Douglas? have I not all their letters to meet me in arms by the ninth of the next month? and are they not some of them set forward already? What a pagan rascal is this!
an infidel! Ha! you shall see now in very sincerity of fear and cold heart, will he to the king and lay open all our proceedings. O, I could divide myself and go to buffets, for moving such a dish of skim milk with so honourable an action! Hang him!
let him tell the king: we are prepared. I will set forward to-night.
Enter LADY PERCY
How now, Kate! I must leave you within these two hours. LADY PERCY O, my good lord, why are you thus alone?
For what offence have I this fortnight been A banish'd woman from my Harry's bed?
Tell me, sweet lord, what is't that takes from thee Thy stomach, pleasure and thy golden sleep?
Why dost thou bend thine eyes upon the earth, And start so often when thou sit'st alone?