The alehouse, for it was no better, was situated in the bottom of a little dell, through which trilled a small rivulet. It was shaded by a large ash tree, against which the clay-built shed, that served the purpose of a stable, was erected, and upon which it seemed partly to recline. In this shed stood a saddled horse, employed in eating his corn. The cottages in this part of Cumberland partake of the rudeness which characterises those of Scotland. The outside of the house promised little for the interior, notwithstanding the vaunt of a sign, where a tankard of ale voluntarily decanted itself into a tumbler, and a hieroglyphical scrawl below attempted to express a promise of "good entertainment for man and horse." Brown was no fastidious traveller--he stopped and entered the cabaret [*See Note 1. Mumps's Ha'.]
The first object which caught. his eye in the kitchen was a tall, stout, country-looking man, in a large jockey great-coat, the owner of the horse which stood in the shed, who was busy discussing huge slices of cold boiled beef, and casting from time to time an eye through the window, to see how his steed sped with his provender. Alarge tankard of ale flanked his plate of victuals, to which he applied himself by intervals. The good woman of the house was employed in baking. The fire, as is usual in that country, was on a stone hearth, in the midst of an immensely large chimney, which had two seats extended beneath the vent. On one of these sat a remarkably tall woman, in a red cloak and slouched bonnet, having the appearance of a tinker or beggar. She was busily engaged with a short black tobacco-pipe.
At the request of Brown for some food, the landlady wiped with her mealy apron one corner of the deal table, placed a wooden trencher and knife and fork before the traveller, pointed to the round of beef, recommended Mr. Dinmont's good example, and, finally, filled a brown pitcher with her home-brewed. Brown lost no time in doing ample credit to both. For a while, his opposite neighbour and he were too busy to take much notice of each other, except by a good-humoured nod as each in turn raised the tankard to his head.
At length, when our pedestrian began to supply the wants of little Wasp, the Scotch storefarmer, for such was Mr. Dinmont, found himself at leisure to enter into conversation.
"A bonny terrier that, sir--and a fell [*Fiery] chield at the vermin, I warrant him--that is, if he's been weel entered, for it a' lies in that.""Really, sir," said Brown, "his education has been somewhat neglected, and his chief property is being pleasant companion.""Ay, sir? that's a pity, begging your pardon--it's great pity that--beast or body, education should aye be minded. I have six terriers at hame, forbye twa couple of slow-hunds, five grews, [*Greyhounds] and a wheen [*Few] other dogs. There's auld Pepper and auld Mustard, and young Pepper and young Mustard, and little Pepper and little Mustard--I had them a' regularly entered, first wi' rottens [*Rats]--then wi' stots or weasels--and then wi' the tods and brocks [*Badgers]--and now they fear naething that ever cam wi' a hairy skin on't.""I have no doubt, sir, they are thoroughbred--but, to have so many dogs, you seem to have a very limited variety of names for them?""Oh, that's a fancy o' my ain to mark the breed sir; the Deuke himself has sent as far as Charlies hope to get ane o' Dandie Dinmont's Pepper and Mustard terriers--Lord, man, he sent Tam Hudson [* The real name of this veteran sportsman is now restored] the keeper, and sicken a day as we had wi' the foumarts [*Polecats] and the tods, and sicken a blythe gaedown as we had again e'en! Faith, that was a night!
"I suppose game is very plenty with you?""Plenty, man!--I believe there's mair hares than sheep on my farm;and for the moor-fawl, or the gray-fowl, they lie as thick as doos in a dooket--Did ye ever shoot a black-cock, man?""Really I had never even the pleasure to see one, except in the museum at Keswick.""There now--I could guess that by your Southland tongue--It's very odd of these English folk that come here, how few of them has seen a black-cock! I'll tell you what--ye seem to be an honest lad, and if you'll call on me--on Dandie Dinmont--at Charlies-hope--ye shall see a black-cock, and shoot a black-cock, and eat a black-cock too, man.""Why, the proof of the matter is the eating, to be sure, sir; and Ishall be happy if I can find time to accept your invitation.""Time, man? what ails ye to gae hame wi' me the now? How d'ye travel?""On foot, sir; and if that handsome pony be yours, I should find it impossible to keep up with you.""No unless ye can walk up to fourteen mile an hour. But ye can come ower the night as far as Riccarton, where there is a public--or if ye like to stop at jockey Grieve's at the Heuch, they would be blythe to see ye, and I am just gaun to stop and drink a dram at the door wi' him, and I would tell him you're coming up--or stay--gudewife, could ye lend this gentleman the gudeman's galloway, and I'll send it ower the Waste in the morning wi' the callant?" [*Lad]
The galloway was turned out upon the fell, and was swear to catch--"Aweel, aweel, there's nae help for't, but come up the morn at ony rate.--And now, gudewife, I maun ride, to get to the Liddel or it be dark, for your Waste has but a kittle [*Ticklish]
character, ye ken yourself."